Healthy Sex Support Group

This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.

1 Online
1 Online

No means NO ..... even on-line !!!!

I apologize to the decent folks here for taking up board space with a long ranting vent of mine. I putting it here because only people on my friends list can read my journals and since I deleted this person from my friends list, he can no longer read my journals and his profile is private so I can't message him with this message. I know he lurks all the time on HS and has posted on occasion so this message is mainly for HIM, you know who you are and it's also for anyone else who might have the same mentality.

In my profile, I clearly state I do NOT cyber sex. My profile statement: You're welcome to message me if you want my opinion on something or if you just want to talk, vent, need support, whatever but I do NOT sex chat so don't waste your time sending me a message looking to cyber sex cause it ain't gonna happen! That is reserved for my partner only!

I deleted you as a friend because you crossed my boundaries. Anyone who crosses my boundaries has no room in my life whether in real life or on-line. I don't just expect my boundaries to be respected, I DEMAND my boundaries be respected at all times and if that's too difficult for someone to do, then that person is out of my life. I told you once I do not cyber sex, I gave you the benefit of the doubt and kept you on my friends list, I told you twice "no", I tried to be nice and explain it to you since apparently you're too dense to understand but then I had to tell you no once again (and it's also a NO to having an interest in seeing pics of your dick, don't know why you would think I'd be interested in seeing your dick) so now you are OUT! .

Yes, I love sex, I enjoy talking about sex, I'm very open and uninhibited sexually but I have zero interest in cyber sexing with you or any man or woman for that matter other than my partner. With my partner, our on-line sex chats turn into real live sex, the real deal, it's a form of foreplay for us, it keeps our fires burning when we're not together.......do you honestly think anything you can say to me on-line could come anywhere near what I have with my man? If so, you think way to highly of yourself!

When I say NO, I don't mean maybe, I don't mean try to convince me, I don't mean hound me enough and I'll go along with it, I don't mean I'm playing a game of cyber sex hard to get, what I mean when I say no is ........... NO!!!

I don't know what part of this you have so much trouble comprehending but my advice is to learn the meaning of the word no, learn how to respect other people and their boundaries, it will help you out a great deal in your life!

As a side note, I see nothing wrong with cyber sexing with strangers or on-line friends for those who enjoy it and are into it, have all the fun you want with it, it's just not my deal.

Again, I apologize to the decent folks who actually might read all this ranting and bitching.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

I know exactly what you're saying and you are fully in your right in exercising your right to your life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.

Clowns get try to get in the way.
itson
itson

DANG!,,,,I just keep getting outed,,,
des10ed2b
des10ed2b

yep. i have had to delete more than a couple people from my friends list for this same thing. just because i am in a healthy sex room does not mean i have interest in talking sexual specifically with you.
deleted_user
deleted_user

whew and i was just about to send you a picture of me strung up in a dungeon naked lifted off the ground with handcuffs and bruises from all the whippings I got. glad I saw this post
Whyme12
Whyme12

You go Leather!

Respect is a huge thing in my life, and if you're just going to come in and start being an a-hole and pushing me past my limits than I'm going to get pissed.

You have every right to express your opinions. Lets hope the person finally gets the hint! And kudos to deleting them!
deleted_user
deleted_user

Surprisingly, I've had the same thing happen to me too. We definitely got some weirdos on DS. Anyways, good for you leather, don't take no sh!t.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Bring 'em to me....I'll talk to 'em....
arem
arem

Yes, mutual respect is key! Very clear message - well done.
goodgurl
goodgurl

I agree but why didn't you ignore
deleted_user
deleted_user

@ Goodgurl: The reason I put it out here is because this is not the first male or female that has tried to get me to cyber. I will say he's been the most persistent though, how many times does someone have to be told no before it sinks in? My profile clearly states not to private message me for sex chat but either some people don't read profiles or they're just assholes who do read profiles but think it's okay even though I said it's not okay.

For those who don't check out profiles, now they don't have to look at my profile to know where I stand.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Sorry Okie, there are some bdsm practices I'm not into and suspension bondage is one of them. ;o)
deleted_user
deleted_user

no means " no i dont mind trashy talk from females at all " ..
tossedaside
tossedaside

hmmm, wow, ya know, I have always felt it an extreme honor to have wise influences, mentors in my life, my true life and my on line life. Leather has and hopefully always will be such a person.
I think it was just yesterday, I read how a few really enjoy her comments and knowledge about a subject most all love, SEX
Now I read how some have decided to gain specific attention from her, while she has repeatedly said NO. What gives, if you lurk here, which apparently you do, and you have a fancy for someone, which apparently you do, why would you risk being banned, losing a friend, losing a wealth of knowledge for your own moment of satisfaction. just enjoy the idea of being able to read some posts here and there that stir your imagination, don't feel you have to pursue farther, the woman has said NO, leave it be, leave it alone, call a 1-900 and get your release, but please, please, do not persist in your actions, You just might drive away a very important member of this community. Use your head, and NO not that one, JMO
debmitchell
debmitchell

I want to be more like Leather. I've never been terribly good at standing up for myself.

Alright, Leather!
deleted_user
deleted_user

@ Deb: It takes a lot to piss me off but once someone gets me there, they are through.

I'm 51% sweetheart and 49% bitch, that line shouldn't be crossed. ;o)