Bit reluctant, first post here. Trying to pull myself together, as I have been living in guilt, fear, and a passionless state. Eight years ago I broke down and lost my virginity to a prostitute. I'm clean, no STD's or AIDS, thank God. My guilt hits me every time I even think about trying to look for female companionship. My low self-esteem lead me to breaking my morals and now I have depressive episodes because of my weakness. If I ever break this cycle of depression and work back to respecting myself, I still have the fear that no woman will ever want me for what I have done. Even if I get beyond a first date, to start a relationship with a woman, and sexual history is brought up, I know I can't lie. Would any good self-respecting woman have enough forgiveness for someone like myself?
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