So, I moved my husband's things/clothes to the guest room. He was upset and rightfully so. I probably didn't do a good thing here in doing that, but I had to take action. (We did discuss him moving out of the bedroom, clothes and all...but the thought we would do this on Sunday). It did make him angry and I think it made him scared that I acted so fast.
I did have a first session with a therapist. It did not go real well in my opinion. I did not mesh with the therapist. I learned about golf though. (That's kind of a red flag). I wanted to talk and voice myself in a safe space and I learned about all the metephors of golf. I know there are good therapist and eh, not-so-good ones. I found the eh. So back to the drawing board.
I feel better sleeping without my husband for the time being. I need space and time at this point. I have now told him that. There have been some very hurtful words from him in the past few days. Some of them are very deep at this point. The other night my husband was telling me about all the times he had felt rejection from me, intimately. Yes, I have played my part in that. But he said something that I cannot forget, or get over....he told me that the thought of being intimate with me right now makes him sick and nauseated. He doesn't want rejection and he doesn't want to force me to be intimate, so he's nauseated even thinking about being intimate.
One: I would never say that to someone, ever, not even my spouse. Two: I would be in therapy to work on that to see if I can repair the mapping in my head that lead me to that place. Please do not ever tell your spouse these things. Damaging words can't be taken back.
Anyway, I am seeking someone again for counseling, and for the both of us. We both need marriage counseling ASAP.
Thanks for letting me vent here. It's been a horrible week and a stressful one.
Nothinn happened. It was a typical morning. Really it started last night. Anxiety. I NEEDED my meds. I wasn't myself. I feel more myself when I'm not momming. Kids come home from Dads and my anxiety comes with them. That makes me feel like a terrible mom but I know it's pure hyper vigilance and with my history that's understandable. Last night the neighbors were loud and I heard strange noises. I...
Hi, I am new here. I came here because I am dealing with traumas from my childhood and my rape. I need support because I have no access to any in-person support groups.Four years ago I was brutally raped by a stranger and could never see him because it was late at night and was very dark. I never knew who it was. It was a very traumatic experience and I kept it all to myself for 3 years (but...