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my son askeed if he could get into a fight

deleted_user
deleted_user
just wanting people's opinions...i put this on the parenting teen board too...

hi...my oldest is 15...he wants to fight this other kid that has been giving him a really hard time, bullying him and others and treating girls disrespectfully and disrespecting his girlfriend. i don't think my son should fight this time....

last year, he confronted a bully and ended up getting suspended for 10 days, for pushing him....and he got charges pressed on him for disorderly conduct....i watched the video the school had and really, the school and the police were way too harsh on him...

but, he just made the honor roll for the first time, he has tons of friends, is a complete social butterfly and makes good decisions, at least from what i can tell....i just don't think it's worth him fighting this guy this time....

what do you guys think?
deleted_user
deleted_user
i was bullied all through school, fight that kid one on one and god bless ur son!
deleted_user
deleted_user
In some situations it would work and in others it might backfire. I guess what can they do if everyne says that he didn't hit the guy first then it is self defence..
deleted_user
deleted_user
i would report the bully to the school councillor, see if they can get some sort of intervention going, if not take him out the back behind the shed and clear the air, if this means a fight so be it. but only if the school fails to act.
deleted_user
deleted_user
well, this kid is known to carry knives and brass knuckles.....my son just likes to fight the old fashioned way...fists.....
deleted_user
deleted_user
fighting physically never works. Take the bully down with the authorities at school. praise your son for doing the right thing.
Goof
Goof
my 13 yr old was hit in the back of his head with a rock on school grounds and had to have 4 stitches to close it....by a bully...I let the Police handle it...physical violence never works...I would NEVER encourage my son to fight anyone...not worth it
deleted_user
deleted_user
Firstly, as a parent i would talk to the school counsellor and the principal, if that did not work, i would actually get a petition started as a parent about how this bully is acting and how it is emotionally affecting the students at the school and that you fear for the children's safety and that this boy needs to a: vbe given counselling for his behaviour
or
b: be removed from the school

These days anything can happend..your sone may fight him and win..but the bully may relaliate by bringing a gun to school and hurting everyone...good luck i am sorry you have to go through this! congratulations on raising a son who is willing to stick up for his friends even if it means jepardising his future....very selfless!
deleted_user
deleted_user
thanks everyone for your responses....i'm going to share them with my son so he can have some more perpective...thanks again!
jimmysquirrel
jimmysquirrel
alrighty... i was one of those that was bullied, until i learned to stand up for myself... without throwing a punch. What i would do is stand up and intercede myself between any potential "innocents"... and i would say something along the lines of, "i am not going to throw the first punch, and i am not going to egg you on, but if you have something to say, say it to me." And just standing up usually worked, but there are times when it didn't.that was when my martial arts training was beneficial, because they would throw a punch or what's not, but i would deflect the blows until the proper people showed up. i would not throw a punch, and i would not be the aggressor, but i would not stand for bullying.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I think that he should definitely fight him. Sometimes it's the only way to resolve a situation, I may sound simple, but sometimes it just has to come to blows. I've learned the hard way that taking the higher road and "ignoring" the situation does not make it go away, alot of times it can be a snowball effect and make him an easy target for others.
deleted_user
deleted_user
.
If he has to think about it ...then forget it.

Fights are usually spontaneous. if it should have happened, it would have happened by now.

IMO

.
deleted_user
deleted_user
well, it didn't happen...so far everyone has kept their hands to themselves...:)
deleted_user
deleted_user
.

A Win - Win situation.

Well done :-)

.
deleted_user
deleted_user
thanks...

they almost got into a fight at the movies on friday...but it didnt' happen and i am glad for it....the other kids actually tried to make peace with my son....i just hope my son can move on and not hold grudges...thanks everyone!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I'd be very reluctant to encourage my son to get into a fight with a kid who carries brass knuckles and knives.

While you son might want a "clean" fight, i seriously doubt that the bully has any concept of what a "clean" fight means.
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