It's 12 noon and I'm writing this because i honestly don't have anyone to pysically talk to. The title of this is just roommates because that is what my marriage has become. And I'm ready to leave now. I no longer care for marriage counceling I just want to leave. I am so tired of asking him to spend time with me. I am so tired of being the only person that strikes up the conversation and he is like a brick wall. I am so tired of playing back the lies in my head that he told me when we was dating. How much he loves me and how he will always be here for me. How he will never change and the vows we recited to eachother on the day we wed. It was all lies. And I' m furious. We are a young couple and I don't understand why he acts like the flame we had burning in the beginning of our relationship has to be extinguished now. I wish I could time travel to the time we was dating it was the time of my life. He was the man I knew and fell in love with. It's like he can go play golf everyday, he can go hang out with his brother, he can hang out with people from work but when I ask to spend some time together he doesn't do it. We just see eachother in bed after work. If we are off work he leaves early in the morning while I'm still sleep and I won't see him till later. When we are in the house together he's watching t.v. playing games and ignores me. I hate him. I resent it all. The regection is embarrasing and makes me feel like he stomed on my heart. I will do anything for him I try to make this work but he gives forth no effort at all. The only time I get interaction from him is when he's fondling on me at night for sex. No foreplay no cuddling no lovemaking just sex. and I feel used and short changed. I cry myself to sleep. He's inconsiderate and I'm tired of it. I am nothing to him. our relationship is just convienent for him the way it is no matter how much its killing me. He doesn't want me to leave him but he doesn't try to keep me interested. that is why we are only roommates with benifits is how i see it.
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