.

No waaaaaaay.

Co-dependant on yourself to have the confidence to express what you want is a healthy thing.

Is it not ?

...

Sunshine-
I can "TOTALLY" relate to everything you've said,as I feel the same way in my marraige.
I give- I get nothing in return.
I try to please him-He doesn't care.
Getting to the point where I believe it's "not in the cards for me to be happy".
That I'll never get the love back that I give.
Good Luck-hope you find the answers!

Thanks Ronin! I need someone like you on my side. Healthy is all I want to be. Going to discuss 'codependency' in therapy later this week. I've begun therapy as an outlet for my thoughts, etc.

Sensation- I understand completely where you are coming from and it's hard not to keep the mentality of 'I don't think I'll ever be happy'...but we can't be happy until we, ourselves are happy...with our happiness comes strength and with strength we make things happen. We are in this together! Hugs~

well, codependent? maybe, maybe not... a codependent trait? yes definitely. You only feel validated in love if you have it come from someone else. Now, this is just a red flag, it doesn't mean codependency... besides, most people have some codependent qualities... it is a part of how we are raised almost(society-wise), that in order for someone to feel complete, they HAVE to have the love of a mate.
Now... here is the thing... sometimes we give our love to someone that is not only unwilling, but UNABLE to love us in return... but then we just invest more, because we start making excuss for why they act that way. We start to try to do all the "right things" to make this person love us.
This is codependent behavior, and someone who has this problem, is at a large risk of gettin involved in an abusive relationship.
As for deserving to be loved by someone else... maybe, maybe not... that is the wrong tack to take... because that almost interferes with free will. A person makes a decision to love someone else. Now, for a loving relationship, both people needs to choose the other in the relationship... but this doesn't always happen... and when it doesn't, one needs to cut their losses and move on. I could go on with this for a long time, but yeah... i have some work to do :P

No and that is exactly how I am. I want to find someone who will be there for me as strong as I am there for him...so if he loves me an inch, that is how much I will love him...if he loves me a mile, I will do the same...it saves me from getting disappointed or hurt...even though I want to fall hopelessly in love with every guy I date but I have to be smarter than that. x

And that is the reason why my relationships don't last and I am almost always single...but I don't mind. I'd rather be single and unhappy than be in a relationship and terribly unhappy...there is a difference.