Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
My wife is too attached to other family members who have made poor choices in life for themselves. Her affiliation is so acute with these individuals (they are adults, some as old as 40yrs old), she seems to place them as a priority over her relationship with her husband; me.
She really believes that her catering to these "consuming" family members is helping them. It doesn't, they are always getting into trouble with the law and never able to hold down a job. They only talk about making things better, but they never do.
My wife keeps telling me she doesn't mind being there for them. She thinks that if she isn't there for them, no one else will be.
Other family members are voicing their concern to me, but not to her. They are afraid of upsetting her and she holding a grudge against them. I want them to say something because I need help in making her understand.
How can I get others to step up and state their thoughts?
She really believes that her catering to these "consuming" family members is helping them. It doesn't, they are always getting into trouble with the law and never able to hold down a job. They only talk about making things better, but they never do.
My wife keeps telling me she doesn't mind being there for them. She thinks that if she isn't there for them, no one else will be.
Other family members are voicing their concern to me, but not to her. They are afraid of upsetting her and she holding a grudge against them. I want them to say something because I need help in making her understand.
How can I get others to step up and state their thoughts?
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
Thanks for your kind words. Let me assure you, I have tried talking to my wife about how I feel...many, many, many times. The response I get is crying and resentment towards me for speaking out against something she does. This is what is stressing me. I believe if I could get her in front of a counselor, therapist or just someone non-biased, it may open up a constructive line of communication. But you know what...she will not agree to speak with anyone about us. Go figure.
Good luck!