Ive been married for a year now and i will say it's terrible.It's the hardest thing Ive had to deal with. I thought the incest in my teen years was fatal. I'm trying so hard to stay optimistic but My heart is smashed into pieces that i'm not sure I can. My husband was my bestfriend, the person I could depend on and have my back when I needed him the most. Instead, he has abandoned me and left me loveless. we don't talk anymore, he is never romantic when I try to be he acts as if he "didn't get it", he's not understanding and he does'nt defend nor protect me. I don't know why I am still married. Maybe because our daughter. I made a promise to myself that I would not raise my daughter fatherless as i was. but my husband doesn't love me anymore. Im sure of it. He doesn't treat me the way he did long ago. I have tried spying to see if he was having an affair and i found nothing i just think we are growing apart. it is so painful to watch. I've offered marriage theraphy but he refused three times. He claims we don't have problems and that I'm overreacting. I guess he rather watch the ship sink than to prevent it. I have became bitter and angry. I was once sad and very depressed. Not only about our relationship but my life in general. I'm overall unhappy and wish i could just run away and start all over. I guess its depression that's causing these feelings. Ive threatened to leave him many times I've even left for a night and that seems to be the only time he reacts to this problem. He will beg and plea for me not to leave him and i give in. things wil be great for 2 weeks then back down hill we go again! im just tired of this rollercoaster! i want my life back. what scares me most is my love for him is dying as the days go by because we are cold towards eachother. Its stressful! btu don't get me wrong i will always love him he's my first everything and the father of my child but I can't take this much longer! i need help can someone give me advice or words of encouragement! im stuck!!!!
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