Healthy Relationships Support Group
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Okay my bf is always negative he is younger than me we have achild together he is 5yrs younger im 27 anyway he always thinking im doing something intentionaly no matter what i say or do. He takes everything the wrong way.
Sometimes im just happy mood and he does not like that he constantly wants me to lean on him or need him I am just trying to be optimistic about life and if we get into a fight to talk about it. And if it is something stupid just forget about it and that is what he doesnt like. TRUST me its over dumb things like forget to do something small. LIke if i dont pick up my phone he is so cranky and stays that way does not treat me good or nothing when he is cranky just doesnt talk much and always grouchy.. IT is hard to get along or try to be happy with someone who is always depress and negative. I know he has had a hard life but still. I try to help him but he doest want too.. he gets even more cranky sometimes. Is there any advice out there on this? I use to be the one always getting mad but had a long talk with him and told him that i wanted to change to better the relationship. He agreed but it seems like he doesnt appreciate my change. Also sometimes i try to stay calm and be positive not get into fights and he iwlll bring something from the past that HE knows could lead into a fight. I dont know he is always down, frusterated and depress. I know he is young and a father but i made it clear that if he felt like he did not want to move in with me he did not have to that i wasnt here to pressure anyone, that as long as he is there for his son. He wanted to move in with me actually. He was very secure and stubborn about it. Anyway is ther eany advice on how to deal with a person like this. It is really dragging me down. ANd its hard to be happy i feel like im alone and cant share my happiness. If he is always down..
Like somethings he doesnt understand that are hormonal in woman, like PMS. I do get cranky sometimes but catch myself and get rid of it fast and am in a better mood. and he is the opposite now he stays that way. Sometimes i think to my self OK who is the girl in the relationship here. I dont understand what his problem is why he cant maintain happy for a long time. He always jumps right back to crankiness. Always.
Sometimes im just happy mood and he does not like that he constantly wants me to lean on him or need him I am just trying to be optimistic about life and if we get into a fight to talk about it. And if it is something stupid just forget about it and that is what he doesnt like. TRUST me its over dumb things like forget to do something small. LIke if i dont pick up my phone he is so cranky and stays that way does not treat me good or nothing when he is cranky just doesnt talk much and always grouchy.. IT is hard to get along or try to be happy with someone who is always depress and negative. I know he has had a hard life but still. I try to help him but he doest want too.. he gets even more cranky sometimes. Is there any advice out there on this? I use to be the one always getting mad but had a long talk with him and told him that i wanted to change to better the relationship. He agreed but it seems like he doesnt appreciate my change. Also sometimes i try to stay calm and be positive not get into fights and he iwlll bring something from the past that HE knows could lead into a fight. I dont know he is always down, frusterated and depress. I know he is young and a father but i made it clear that if he felt like he did not want to move in with me he did not have to that i wasnt here to pressure anyone, that as long as he is there for his son. He wanted to move in with me actually. He was very secure and stubborn about it. Anyway is ther eany advice on how to deal with a person like this. It is really dragging me down. ANd its hard to be happy i feel like im alone and cant share my happiness. If he is always down..
Like somethings he doesnt understand that are hormonal in woman, like PMS. I do get cranky sometimes but catch myself and get rid of it fast and am in a better mood. and he is the opposite now he stays that way. Sometimes i think to my self OK who is the girl in the relationship here. I dont understand what his problem is why he cant maintain happy for a long time. He always jumps right back to crankiness. Always.
deleted_user
It's really hard having a significant other that is depressed, I know it was very hard for me. Everything you say that he's doing and saying sounds pretty typical of someone who's depressed. As hard as this might be to hear, there's nothing you can do. You control your actions and words, he is the way he is and it's not your fault. I definitely think he can change, but if he's unwilling to try counseling or meds, or anything else, there's not much else you can do.
Dixe4me
I agree with Tareia, it sounds like maybe he needs counseling to deal with childhood issues and maybe meds. Its really hard though because men are not willing to do either. Instead he is looking for you to provide what he needs emotionaly and when he doesn't get it he gets angry. Tough decission on your part.
deleted_user
2 Good replys. Read them again JJ
deleted_user
iam dating someone who is 5 yrs younger then me too and i can kinda relate to you.. he sometimes takes things the wrong way and then it leads into a fight.. if he had a bad day or whatever he gets all cranky and then yells at me. i agree with the last two responses..
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