
Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.

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I am in a relationship and 2 weeks ago he said he needed time so we chose to slow it right down. We are both going through some personal stuff and figured it was a good idea to slow things down until we had dealt with some/all of our issues. We didn't want to end the relationship completely as there is really a connection there. Our only form of communication is through text messages and it's up to him to make the contact. I started seeing a counsellor and she recommended that it stay this way for now.
The problem is...this just isn't enough for me. I want to be able to see him and talk/text whenever I want. I really don't want to end it but it's so hard on me. I don't know what to do?!
The problem is...this just isn't enough for me. I want to be able to see him and talk/text whenever I want. I really don't want to end it but it's so hard on me. I don't know what to do?!
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I have been told if people need their space, you MUST respect it, and if it is meant to be, he will come back around and will come back.
I did not believe it would come back; it seemed permanent to me, because there are other complications in the realtionship.
ANYWAY, yes, you need to respect his space. I know . . it was EXTREMELY hard for me, too. You feel kind of empty, and there is a hole in your heart, but I will tell you my friend called me yesterday, all of a sudden, unexpectedly, and I am so glad he did!! It had been three months. He would not even answer my e-mails.
Pray about it; seek some counseling from someone if you have to in order to get through it, but you do need to respect his space.
IS HE STILL TEXTING YOU, and THEREFORE, STAYING IN TOUCH?
Hang in there - - I had NO contact with my friend for nearly three months solid - - no e-mail, no phone calls, NOTHING! Except, I was in touch with his Mom - I am friends with his family, too, so that helped a little, just to see how he was doing.
It is very hard, but if it is meant to be, it will be.
My point here is that if you care for him then yes you need to give him his space. Dont forget to take yourself into consideration though. Its got to be driving you crazy and making you feel so hurt. It sounds hard i know but maybe if you distanced yourself even more, at least a little bit of the pain could be eased. It may not come immediately but it will get better. I promise. One of my very good friends once told me that if i loved him, then i needed to let him go. If it was meant to be, then he'd come back.
I hope you found something helpful here. My heart really does go out to you. Hang in there... and use this site for all its worth. People here really do care.