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Do i stay or should i go? (sorry its a bit long)

deleted_user
i have been with my boyfriend nearly two years. i have to put up with a lot. he's lazy dosent help round the house. would rather play computer with friends than spend time with me. When we finally get to talk things through he says im being silly, or he accuses me of fancying his mates. we argue almost constantly and he has been violent in the past and since he first hurt me i dont feel like i love him anymore. i know some of u who read this will think im too young to know what love is but hey its worth a shot. back to the point. i have recently developed feelings for someone else and im not sure whether i should leave my boyfriend or not.
please help if u can.
please help if u can.
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you are old enough to know your own mind, and by the sounds of it you sound like you know what you want already, A relationship should make you feel loved, cherished , special and wanted and it sounds like you are gettin none of this from your boyfriend, what are you gaining by staying with him ? nothing really !! youre not married, got no kids so youre not tied down to him, itsounds like he would rather be with his friends anyway. its obv up to you as its your life, but id say move on, find someone who wil give you the respect you deserve, youve met someone already so sounds like youve found that already
This is not meant to sound cold, but if we were talking about a job (same rules apply- it's a relationship too) you would most likely have quit and found something else by now, vs. put up with it for 2 years. The bottom line is whether or not you are ready to do what is right for you or not. It sounds to me like you have made some forward progress, at least mentally. Now, the next step is up to you. Will you take care of yourself, or continue to take care of your boyfriend who doesn't seem to have the same consideration for you?
Good luck!
You already know what you should do.
Be strong. Don't let him bully you into staying. Do what is right for you.
Following your own instincts may result in making mistakes, which you can learn from.
Better to learn from your own instincts than the advice of others, in this instance.
Only you can decide which path to tread.
Good luck.
...
*They had been viliontly violated,
*They were unheard and unvalidated during discussions attempting to resolve relationship problems
*were accused of having feeling for their mates - when unfounded,
*felt they came second to mates and computer games - hey maybe that even third to..
*the someone your advising questions their love for this person
*and to boot - has now developed feelings for a third party.
What would you advise this person?
Now take that advice!
Good luck & take care of yourself
Then what the hell is the question?
Get out! No man [or woman for that matter] has the right to put their hands on you.
You are a strong independant woman and don't you DARE let that man treat you like a doormat.
That is all he is doing, making you clean his house and cook his dinner and sleep with him while he lays around and does his own thing.
You do not need a guy that takes you for grandted and especially one that hits you.
There is NO excuse for a man hurting you.
Take it for someone that knows, my ex boyfriend used to mentally abuse me and on occassions he would put his hands on me and I vowed NEVER to let anyone hurt me again.
Get out, you do not need someone like that. Pack your things and tell him you have had it.
Be strong, if you don't love him you are just wasting precious days of your life you CAN NOT get back.
Goodluck girl, get out of there before he hurts you again.
If you are not happy with this guy and have developed feelings for someone else, by all means "move on"...
You might consider "taking a break" from a relationship to heal your self-esteem for a little while (if it feels too soon to jump into another relationship)...
Anyway, take care of yourself...
What you really need to do is examine yourself. What is it about you that would make you stay in a relationship with someone who treats you like crap just until someone else comes along? I sense a very common issue... some people (my former self included) have a tendancy to stay in one relationship until a better proposition comes along. Ideally, what we should strive for is to be strong enough to get out of a dissatisfying relationship just for the sake of getting out of it. Then spending some time regrouping, developing individually before jumping into a new relationship.
I used to swing from vine to vine because I couldn't stand being alone.... sometimes repeating virtually the same relationship with just a different face attached. We tend to repeat the cycle until we break it, ya know.
A person who is able to be comfortable being alone is going to have much more to offer to a relationship.