I want to start by apologizing if this letter is long I have been keeping it in for weeks!! I come on this site everyday and read the posts sometimes I write sometimes I don't. I usually write when I am feeling good about what i am doing! I had my surgery on oct. 8th and I have lost 77 pounds and i know that is great but over the last month the weight lose has slowed down and I have started to get down on myself! I come on here and I read everyone's WOW moments and I am truly happy for everyone and proud! This is my problem even after losing 77 pounds I have not had a wow moment! The reason is because I was at my biggest ever the day of surgery I have been fighting this weight battle my whole life as most of us are and along the way I won some!! The truth is after having my daughter in 2003 I still was not as big as day of surgery but I got all that weight off and 2004 and 2005 I was thin I looked great and felt great!! Then my Mom got sick and passed away in 200six (six key Broke LOL) I went into such a depression that I put on over 120 pounds! I could not snap out of the depression and because of the weight gain it got worse! I decided surgery because i did not see the light at the end of the tunnel for that battle I knew I needed this tool! The thing is now that I did it and the weight is coming off all I keep saying to myself is "If you did not put the weight on you would not be here" When I notice things like I can bend and tie my shoes I think to myself so what you did that 3 years ago or when I sit and cross my legs samething I think big deal you did that 3 years ago and look what you let happen!! Its very hard because I know its those WOW moments that keep us going. I still have another 50 at least to lose and its getting harder! I have wii fit and my husband hooked it up for me ( i am so bad with video games) I was so embarassed that I could not control that damn remote or do the exercise that I started to cry! I am going to join Curves this week because that is what helped me the last time! With Curves I know I walk in do a 30-40 minute work out and I know i got everybody part! I hope this helps get my spirits up!! The sad thing is I know whats wrong I am being to hard on myself the ? is how do you stop that!!!
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