I met my husband 5 yrs ago. I was desparately trying to sketch out a living as a single mom. The "hits" were a welcome relief to the constant worry where I was going to pay the basic bills. Silly me, I fell in love. The big stories, the trips to Vegas, the rollor coaster rides of excitement as each basket went in, the big "deer eyes" when $20 turned into $1500 in just a few hours. Oh, did i mention that he is very handsome? Then reality set in. Where to get money for food, for rent, for basic needs, him lying to his mother (a complete enabler, i now realize) about our finances, why we needed MORE money when my salary was outstanding, him never holding a job... the holes in the wall, the unexpected pregnancy, the fights, the alcohol, the yelling and name calling, it goes on and on. I'm sure nothing I'm saying is new to anyone... I just feel so alone and so ashamed that my 8yr old cried today because he yelled at her because he was mad about ??? ... tonight he's at his mother's home, because he is mad at me, but now threatening to kill his father in law because of some indignation. Why can't he see HE is the problem? Why can't he put his family first?
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