This is my first post. Ive gambled for the last 10 years. I am now married to a wonderful man for two years. Ive blown the last three paychecks we got and have been begging for extensions on all of our bills. We got paid yesterday, I had budget the entire check out on paper and swore Id pay all of the bills first. I went to the casino first thing in the morning and blew 1900. I actaully won 1,000 an put it all back in. Ive screwed over my husband and my kids time and time again. Ive actually thougt of suicide to end the crazy nonsense. I wish I could divorce my husband but I havent paid the mortage on his house, we rent that out, and it will be in foreclosurs soon. Id rather divorce him than continue to fuck up his life also. I know he knows to some degree. My lies are not always convincing and he finds reciepts to places near the casino but never says anything. For those of you who have beat this addiction HELP. The nearest GA is right by the casino. No way will I not stop there if I go. Im finally getting to rock bottom. If I didnt have a 14 year old still at home. I would just go to sleep forever. I hate this,it has to stop. Please help
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