Just last week, I lost $4500 in winnings because I got too greedy. I used $475 and then when I was down to $40, I somehow was able to make it back to $1000, and then $2000, and then I was going to stop when I was at $2500 but somehow I couldn't stop. I don't know why I couldn't stop myself when I was ahead by such a huge amount. I tried to withdraw at $4500 but with nothing else to do, I played $500 and lost that and I tried to win it back but just kept on losing. And it's been so hard to go on daily without having that number stuck in my head since I will never have that much money at one time ever again. I live paycheck to paycheck at minimum wage with $20,000 debts and now all I have is this numbing self-hatred feeling all day and it makes waking up and interacting with the world so difficult. Has anyone else ever lost this big of an amount at one time and how do you try to forget about it and live on?
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