Friday, April 18, 2008 This week has been the worst week since my daughter Nikita died (8-15-2007). I work as a mail carried and Im thinking about quitting. I had a breakdown 3 weeks ago at work, I told my boss I needeed to leave she was mad to say the least.I honestly think if I would have forced myself to stay at work I probably would have drove over the side of a mountain.Instead I went home to my hubby and went to see my grief counsler.The next day I went to my Dr.and he recommended I take a FMLA leave I called my boss and told her what the dr said ands she called back to tell me I was short about 150 hours so i wasnt allowed. So I only took 2 weeks off. I went back to work on Tuesday Nobody talked to me no one even bother to ask how i was doing.So needless to say I was very depressed and for the fiest couple of hours I was delivering mail I was trying to figure out a way to kill myself but to make it look like a accident so my family wouldnt blame themselfs, on wens dsay iI only cryed a coulple of times on thursday one of my customers told me they were called our to a bad accident a lady was ejected from her car and they were picking up her body parts off the expressway, My daughter died in a car accident and on Friday i broke down out on my route and sat in the mailtruck and lost it for about 15 min. And still no one is talking to me at work. I just dont know how long I can go on like this.
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