i have another person living inside me. she only surfasses late at night, and she has no will power or desire to lose weight. my friend calls her night woman. nightwoman loves sweets (particularly my husbands debbie cake stash) and does not care how much i weigh or how much guilt i will face in the morning for her indulgent acts. last night, night woman ate a soft pretzel with cream cheese on it. (at 3 in the morning) my god, i'd hate to think about how many diet attempts she has sabotaged. the whole concept is so ridiculous, but i cant help but wonder if some part of me wants to stay fat forever. i know when i get up at 3 in the morning and eat, that that's stupid and weak. but i just cant stop myself. i just wreak everything. in a way i want to just give up, quit fighting a be the fatest fat who ever fatted through the fatlands....but honestly i've been fighting so long, i cannot fathom a life w/out it. i'm tired.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...