I've been doing so well... so well! About a month ago I joined this website and started journaling a lot more. It helped so much to be more aware of the reasons I binge, the excuses that I make to allow myself to binge, and all that. Then I got cocky and stopped writing, and now i am back at my parent's house and "on the inside" of the disorder again. Do you know what I mean? It's like, when I'm doing well, I feel great and on top of the world and like nothing could bring me down. Then all at once, even though i've lost ten pounds, I feel fat and out of control. I say on the inside, trapped underneath might be more accurate. It's amazing how there is no middle ground- either I'm counting every calorie or I'm eating everything in sight. I just binged on some honey roasted cashews and now I'm thinking about the key lime pie in the fridge...
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