Six week before christmas my husband who i had been with for 25+yrs told me he was leaving me and our son to move into his own flat as he needed time to sort his head out, i didn,t have a clue what he meant,well let me tell you about my old man!,i married my husband 6th sept 1985 in total we had been together 25+yrs,all during our marriage he had been very tight with his money,several time,s when he was in the armed force,s he gave me 42.00 per week out of that i was suppost to buy our son at that time, all his nappies food as well as buy clothes and pay for bill,s out of that measley amount he gave me, yet he think,s nothing of going to the pub every weekend and buying his friend,s drink,s as well as gambling every weekend! it got so bad that one day i emptied all his money out of his bank account [that time we had a joint bank account] in order to clothe our son and to fill our cupboards which had never been full of food ,of course he found out hit the roof and for a short time we split up [he hit me for taking the money out of our joint account]i didn,t want to steal from him but it was impossible to get him to see that i needed more money to live on as i couldn,t manage my 42.00 per week it was just not working,we finally got back together and he increased my housekeeping,then almost 3yrs ago he came out of the armed forces he told me,you,ve got your disability money so you can have 100.00 per month,because of his tight fistedness i had to buy item,s such as clothing etc in catalougues and i got into debt, well since he has left me i only get my disability pensions and the housekeeping from our son which is 200.00 [it has been put up since his dad left] however because i got myself into debt by trying to live on the pittance he gave me,when he left me i knew i was in trouble as i,d got myself into debt as i,d got myself into a routine of paying my bill,s,then of course he walked out to live with his floozie he get,s 900.00 army pension per month on top of that he gets a war pension 170.00 as well as his wages but he has now been made redundant so i know he,s also got redundancy money and he,s looking for a job,he also has stock,s and shares and he tell,s me i,ve got no money! yet he had enough to e-mail a woman he didn,t even know ,he left our home got himself a flat on the 21st dec he moved out and admitted he,d got another woman and he promptly moved her into his flat,
I am so very upset,i took all my debts to the c.a.b and i owe a total of 6,900, and with the little bit of money i now have left i just cannot afford the money to pay of my debt,s,i have now been advised to declare myself bankrupt,i,m terrified at the prospect of being bankrupt,yet he,s now complaining that it was me who drove him into the arm,s of another woman,he also told me,You are no good with money!} he also didn,t like that i wouldn,t show him all my bill,s because i knew he,d start again,i also am scared about being made bankrupt,i feel so very lost,i,m angry that he,s done this to me,i,m not perfect and he was very good at manipulation and i have filed for divorce, he aslo got a lump sum when he left the army out of that all paid one of my debts and he told me he,d spent it all,my solicitor thinks he has got some money tucked away in a bank account,she has also told me i am entitled to half of his pension,my question is,what happen,s now? what do i do now? i,m really scared as i have now kinda got my money sorted out i,m just so upset that he has put me through all this pain and grief,just because he was too bloody tight with his money,if i asked for anymore money he,d say to me,"When am i gonna get it back!" he treated me like a child and i cannot lie i am terrified of all this stuff that is going on now i.e that i,m going to have to be made bankrupt in april,i would welcome any advice right now if anyone else has ever experianced this could you tell me what it involves? please help me as i am really scared that i will be thrown into jail.