Fibromyalgia Support Group
You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.
If I hear the phrase "You're too young to be blah blah blah" one more time I am going to scream.
Last year after her husband passed, my sweet little old neighbor lady offered to let me garden in her plot this summer. I was so excited becasue we had just purchased this house and preparing a spot for a garden would be very difficult for me. I happily accepted her invitation. A few days ago, she came over to ask when I'd like to begin. I live in MN and we are about 3 weeks behind where we should be with the weather and the ground is just now becoming workable. We chatted for a few minutes while she surveyed our yard (which is in disarray) when she said I could only use two rows becasue she didn't think I'd have the time to keep up with it. I understood where she was coming from. I'm sure she doesn't want a mess in her back yard and fears that I would plant and not care for it. So, to make the situation okay, I told her that over the winter my health had changed (changed, mind you) enough that I didn't feel that I'd be able to garden at all due to the lifting, carrying, bending, kneling, et c. All of that is true. I really had decided to just try my hand at container gardening. I was offering her a way out of her "gift", a way to revoke her original offer without feeling guilty. Her eply was "Oh my. Your're just too young to let little aches and pains get to you. I still go blah, blah, blah and do blah, blah, blah. Lordy if I sat down when I hurt, I'd never get up..."
Well, yes. Yes, I am too young! So now what, in all your wisdom, should I tell the doctors who can't fix me? Hey, doc, I'm too young for this. Hey, God, I'm too young for this. What the heck does it matter what I do do or don't do to anyone other than my family? I was completely offended to say the least. I am sick and tired of people making judgements based on what their eyes can comprehend. In fact, I am just sick of judgemental people who operate on assumption and reaction.
Let's dig a big hole a shove them in!
Last year after her husband passed, my sweet little old neighbor lady offered to let me garden in her plot this summer. I was so excited becasue we had just purchased this house and preparing a spot for a garden would be very difficult for me. I happily accepted her invitation. A few days ago, she came over to ask when I'd like to begin. I live in MN and we are about 3 weeks behind where we should be with the weather and the ground is just now becoming workable. We chatted for a few minutes while she surveyed our yard (which is in disarray) when she said I could only use two rows becasue she didn't think I'd have the time to keep up with it. I understood where she was coming from. I'm sure she doesn't want a mess in her back yard and fears that I would plant and not care for it. So, to make the situation okay, I told her that over the winter my health had changed (changed, mind you) enough that I didn't feel that I'd be able to garden at all due to the lifting, carrying, bending, kneling, et c. All of that is true. I really had decided to just try my hand at container gardening. I was offering her a way out of her "gift", a way to revoke her original offer without feeling guilty. Her eply was "Oh my. Your're just too young to let little aches and pains get to you. I still go blah, blah, blah and do blah, blah, blah. Lordy if I sat down when I hurt, I'd never get up..."
Well, yes. Yes, I am too young! So now what, in all your wisdom, should I tell the doctors who can't fix me? Hey, doc, I'm too young for this. Hey, God, I'm too young for this. What the heck does it matter what I do do or don't do to anyone other than my family? I was completely offended to say the least. I am sick and tired of people making judgements based on what their eyes can comprehend. In fact, I am just sick of judgemental people who operate on assumption and reaction.
Let's dig a big hole a shove them in!
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I miss traveling with my husband. Has anyone found a specific site regarding cruising for widow/widowers or any sightseeing trips. Not interested in being with couples and kids,,,I realize a cruise ship will have a portion size of families and couples, but perhaps they also put together a part of the cruise ship for groups of widows/widowers????
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A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Usually from the Doctors themselves. I have been hearing it for years, and yea I will agree this is just a crock to the person they are saying these things to. I mean come on, is there really an age where you are allowed to be in chronic pain? LOL. Sorry, but my body didn't get the memo, hehe.
The best we can hope for is understanding where you can find it. You just vent away, and also know your not alone in this :).
hell, I am only 44, just got my Kids all Off and happily on their Own, when I was gonna START MY LIFE, and this hit me WAY TO YOUNG...I don't think there is an appropriate AGE for this rediculous Disease at ALL !!
so perhaps explain it one time, in simple terms, I have a Disease that makes my body feel like I am Coming down with a Flu...that Never goes away...keep it simple, don't over explain...and perhaps it can SINK in...even tho this is NOT New, it was virtually unheard of in her day i am sure...cause I had never heard of it til i was Diagnosed...there is No way for us to Know EVERY disease out there...
Hugs to you this day !!
After 4 years I still have trouble trying to explain it. Now that I'm back at work, I'm obviously feeling better than I have in a long time, but, and that's a big BUT, if I dont' pace myself, OMG does it catch up with me. I can waste a whole weekend on the couch, and dont' have a lot of energy for much else even when I have paced myself.
I just try to let the comments slide over me cos I know... ppl just DON'T and CAN'T understand unless they've been in our shoes.
But somehow people seem to feel free to say this to someone with CFS or FMS. Is it because they don't understand what it is? Or they don't understand how much it hurts? Or something else?
The accident in 2006 that made my pain SO much worse in a very short time became a personal injury case. When it came time to talk about the settlement, my lawyer told me I should accept the insurance company's insulting low-ball settlement because the accident happened in a rural area where, if we went to trial, the jury would consist of "farmers who would say "I've had 'reumatiz' all my life and I still get out and plow the field and milk the cows every day - go back to work!"
So it's not just random people - most of the world seems to have that attitude if the don't HAVE fibro, or know someone with fibro.
I feel very fortunate that my boss' mother has fibro. When I say "gotta go, my support group is meeting" she just waves me on instead of asking questions.