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I ended up at lunch with my sister today and I am just so upset and angry with her right now. I did not lose my temper or say anything I will regret but gee whiz, I am still upset. My son is graduating in May, her daughter decided to get married in May. I told them both right away when the graduation was and that I would have his open house to do. Today at lunch my niece says oh your going to be are mistress and master of ceremony. Mind you my husband unknowingly agreed to be the photographer at their wedding, without knowing the date or consulting me.Graduation is one weekend and the wedding is the next. I told them I just did not feel I could do all of it, with Ethan's graduation. My sister says oh graduation is no big thing you just throw some food on the table.I helped with both of her daughters graduation parties, took the day off in front of them. I went to both of her daughters graduation ceremonies. We did not just throw the food on the table. She helped with my oldest sons open house but not my daughters. She did not come to her graduation either but did put in an appearance at the open house. This same sister made her daughter quit softball, when she realized that district softball tournaments were on the same day as the day she wanted for the open house. She could of kept the same day and pushed back the time, so her daughter could play. Today was almost more than I could bear, it really got to me. Well, you better never ask me to do it for one of your kids. I would not ever because she is just to pushy and its her way or no way, and I am more about compromise and finding a middle ground. She made a few other remarks that were meant to be hurtful as well and I just let them go. We had five of the nieces there with us today, if we had been alone i might have given her a piece of my mind. I love her to death but she can be the most self absorbed person I know. She totally dominated the conversation and hardly anyone else got to talk. The daughter who is getting married was there and did not really get to say much about the wedding. I felt bad for her, its her wedding and she did not get to share it. We heard about my sisters dog, her job, her car, her bowling leaque, her daughters birthday, all about the wedding, the cost of the wedding, her inability to find a decent dress, her health, what movies she has watched, and her sex life.Oh well now that i have vented maybe it will help. Sometimes I don't like being the nice sister, but I do know why I am the favorite Aunt. HaHa.
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Sorry to hear about the trauma but your loyalty is to your own family first and anything else is extra.
Hope that you can work through the situation and that you have a great graduation for your son. It is a once-in-a-lifetime event. Enjoy the day.
You are a SAINT to have sat there having to endure that ego.
As for your son's graduation,
THAT is your priority. He graduates but once --- You had already informed SIS of your comittment and it STANDS.
She loses, forget about anything that SHE planned for YOU.. It was deceitful and disrespectful of her to ASSUME you would give up your PROMISE to YOUR SON.
The next time your sister insist on taking over the conversation and describing the wedding, look her straight in the eye and tell her you did not ask her, you ask your neice.. if she continues to but in, tell her again that she is unfair to her daughter and you would not be surprised if your neice did not drop the plans and not have anything to do with mummy.
Ask her if she plans on ruling the life of her daughter and future son-in-law after they marry? When she is sitting there with her chin on the floor, tell her to mind her own business for ONCE and stop trying to control everything.
You may not get a Christmas Card, or a nice gift for your BIrthday, but take delight in knowing you will not have to endure her rath on your special day!!
I feel sorry for the Bride.. maybe she should talk to the Groom and THEY should decide to RUN Away, Far, Far Away...