I have been sitting back watching the discussion about the woman who faked a suicide attempt and all of the responses to it and feel like I need to say something. I hope that anyone who reads my words will understand that what I say is simply my opinion based solely on my life experiences. Someone elses life experiences will produce different opinions and that is what makes us unique and interesting people.

First, it is important to state that I have a grandfather who committed suicide when my father was very young. His (my dad's)younger brother then shot and killed my dad's mother and then himself in 93. My father held so much guilt about both of these instances that in 98 he too shot and killed himself.

Obviously, I come from a background of tragedy and drama. I decided a long time ago that I would break the cycle of my "family legacy" (as my dad always believed) and learn to cope with bad situations in a new way. I decided to gear my education to learning more about mental health so I could learn everything I could (I have taken a particular interest in suicide)because after all knowledge is power.

Here is what I believe. A person that is suicidal doesn't just wake up one day and decide to kill themselves. The idea is something that develops over time as depression builds. A person might fake a suicide attempt to see how others may respond. Maybe to see if they are cared for or if anyone would care. Once they start it may start to snowball. An adult who is "looking for attention" to me is still asking for help.

However, with that being said it is no way anyone's responsibility to help someone who is suicidal. You can give only as much as you can. Before my dad killed himself he lived with so much guilt that it was his fault that the people in his life died and he wasn't able to stop them. I spent many nights on the phone asking him "how could you have stopped them?" "What could you have done?" He lived in Iowa when his brother killed his mother and himself. Really what could he have done? When my dad killed himself it was devastating to me but I didn't have the kind of survivor's guilt that people talk about. I came to terms very quickly that my dad had made the decision to die a long time ago. He was mentally ill. He refused to take his medicine and his last words to me were "I have accepted that I have an illness". Of course I didn't know what it meant at the time. I know now that people who are serious about suicide actually come to terms with something right before they commit the act and are at a very peaceful place.

The point that I am trying to make is that when a person is "looking for attention" they are in fact asking for help. If you are up to it I believe the direct approach works best "I can see that you are asking for help, what can I do?" If the person chooses to accept your help then give only what you can. And yes, that may be to direct them to some professional help. However, if you are not able to give that person help weather it is because your fibro is acting up, distance or you don't know who the person even is why not say a prayer for them and move on. Unfortunately as much as we would like to we can't save everyone. There are people out there that just need more then we can give and all we can do is hope and pray they get the help they need.

I hope I haven't offended anyone-like I said I write only my opinion based my own experiences.
Take care everyone and give yourselves a gentle hug!