I probably did a really stupid thing. I had my sister come on here and read my journal and a discussion I had posted. I don't know what she thought. She never really said. She's a nurse. She thinks I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. That I'm accepting defeat. She says there are a lot of people who have it worse than me and they don't wallow in it. She lives in Canada. She has seen me for 3 weeks in the last 4 years. Those 3 weeks I did everything in my power to be well so that I could spend quality time with her and her children. You know how you do - you just keep pushing and pushing. Then when she left I totally crashed. Four years ago my pain and fatigue were minimal. A lot can change in 4 years. I'm just so hurt that she thinks I'm just taking the easy way out. She doesn't see my daily struggle. How there are days when I can't remember so many things.....people, their names, how to do something, what word goes with what, how to spell....sometimes I have to look at the stove for a long time just to figure out if I'm turning on the right eye, the same applies to the washing machine. But she makes me feel like I'm whining if I try to explain all of this to her. I have begged her to believe me. She's all I have left besides my kids! I love her so much and have always looked up to her. Have always wanted her acceptance. I just don't know what else to do about it.
Posts You May Be Interested In
I got hit by a truck.And, yowch.Well, metaphorical truck, AKA license plate FIBROCats ere howling.Weather change.Overdid it.And now my mom's landlord is doing another thing, and I just want to swear at them in Polish, but I can't get my pronunciation right, so I'm not saying what I want to say and it's laughable and irritating.(WHere I live in Virginia, nobody knows Polish. I can cuss all I want...
I wrote a poem for New Zealand National Poetry Day on Aug 23rd and I think it's about us. Out LMBM group