Fibromyalgia Support Group

You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.

4 Online
4 Online

I need your input, please.

Long story short - about 4 1/2 years ago, I was involved in a car accident where I was hit from behind and suffered whiplash. Well, the pain never went away and subsequenlty diagnosed with fibro.

HERE IS MY QUESTION TO YOU - WHEN DO YOU GIVE UP ON SEEKING TREATMENT?

I am asking because my lawyer informed me that when I finally get to go to court later this month, I am going to come across as a malingering, drug-seeking, doctor shopper because I have seen 3 different orthopedists, 2 different rheumatologists, 2 different physical therapists,2 different pain management provides, 2 different chiropractors, in addition to an accupunturist, massage therapists, in search of "the answers" and trying to find the right combination. Either they had nothing to offer me, brushed me off (gee, imagine that?), or I chose not to return due to distance. When I tried to explain to him that each of these professionals brings a different perspective and/or treatment modality to the table, after he was done yelling at me, he basically told me that I should give up seeking alternative treatments, and "learn to live with it" as that is what he would do. Guarantee you, if that pain was in his testicles, he wouldn't want to "live with it." When I told him that I did not think that he really understood, boy he did get hot and really go off on me. I told him that I was not going to give up as my youngest child was only 8 years old and I am not even 46. Just for the record, I have never received pain medication from any other practitioner than my family doctor, who I have seen for 20 years and is testifying on my behalf and have used the same pharmacy. I started out with Tylenol No. 3 and have been on Vicodin 5/500 for the past year. That is it. Not really heavy-duty meds.

I have read numerous articles and books that have stated that chronic pain suffers do seek care with multiple providers before they find the right combination. How about yourself? I would really appreciate your feedback because I am really feeling defeated about now.

gentle hugs, robin :)

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

First let me say your lawyer is an idiot!!!! He is one of those people who doesn't believe that this horrible disease is real. Second, never ever stop trying to find a dr that will help you. It sometimes takes a very long time and can very easily involve more than one dr. Sometimes a Rhuemy and a pain management dr or many other combinations. I myself am still looking for a GOOD dr. The one who first diagnosed me I had to quit seeing because of my ex. Haven't found another dr. who is willing to treat me. So I just keep looking. It's really tough but you will find a good one or two and eventually find the right combo of meds to help you. Don't give up. Gentle hugs to you
deleted_user
deleted_user

Susie - thank you so much for being the first to respond - your support and kind words has brought happy tears to my eyes.

robin :)
deleted_user
deleted_user

I've been where you are Sportsmom, I raised 4 boys of my own. The answers are out there I promise. You hang in and let me know if you ever need to chat. Try kicking your lawyer in the gonads and see if he thinks that pain is real. I always wanted to do that. lol
deleted_user
deleted_user

I've seen a number of doctors for the same reasons. Some have different ways of treating fibromyalgia and some don't treat it or know how to treat it.

Hope things work out well for you.

Sending you Hugs and Prayers
deleted_user
deleted_user

Print what you wrote and take it with you to court and give it to the judge! Or send it to the judge. It will probably do more for you than your attorney! Best of luck to you. NEVER GIVE UP!
deleted_user
deleted_user

Doesn't sound to me like you did anything wrong. It's hard to accept that there are no answers to a fix a problem, especially since someone else caused it. Excuse my bluntness, but your lawyer sounds like a real ass! He's supposed to be working on your behalf not recommending your medical treatment. Maybe he has issues of his own! Is it too late to find a new lawyer?
WhiteDolphin
WhiteDolphin

I agree with the others. Don't give up.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Can you get a new Lawyer? He sounds horrible!! He is hired to help you and work for you, not against you.

I guarantee, if his testicles or any of the other doctors testicles hurt like a son of a bitch too, with no "apparent reason or cause" they, too would be understanding and accepting the nature of fibro a WHOLE lot better.

I dont think you have seen too many doctors at all in your 4 year quest to find help and answers. This Lawyer just floors me.

Dont give up. Just dont give up.

Me...yeah...I was telling myself, I give up too...back to ibuprophen and just live like this. I cant. There has got to be a doc somewhere out here who gets this and I just have not found him/her yet.

When my gait was totally off yesterday afternoon, last night and it still is this am--I tell you...I cant do this alone. Theres no way. Unless I get a cane and just deal with it. The knee pain during my sleep time was excruciating last night. It is too much pain.

I know exactly how you feel about wanting to give up...but seriously we cant.

I owe my kids to be a good Mother.

If I give up; I think I would fail them if I do that.

I hope I am making sense. Im rambling and waiting for the caffeine to energize this weary body of mine.

Hugs and love
Abotsd
Abotsd

of course we shouldn't give up. everyone with sense is trying to better their lives. we have a big challenge with this disease so poorly understood and accepted. that is not our fault. keep trying to find releif. that's is the humane thing to do. have empathy for yourself. we are all so tired and achy and without the necessary help. someday there will be a treatment that works. hang in there. and keep trying to be well. i'm not giving up though there are days.
deleted_user
deleted_user

your lawyer had no right to say any of that i've beensick for years and if hadnt switched ddoctors i never would have been diagnosed correctly and would have died last year!!! as far as fibro goes i too have been told by my fibro dr the one pill he has tried is my only option cause of my other illness and i should apply for disability and start a physical therapy program for fibro, hang in there fight for yourself!! we shouldnt just have to deal with it, we just have to keep looking for the doctor who will find something that helps us!
imKarenM
imKarenM

I don't think you did anything wrong. I also don't think he MEANT to come across as an insenitive ass.

I think he wanted to prepare you for the challenges you would face in court and got frustrated when he failed to communicate that to you. He may very well understand WHY you have seen so many providers.

He also understands the impact that will have on your case. He's just looking for the way to present you in the best light, and that means being prepared for any possible negative interpretations of your actions; afterall, that's his job.
imKarenM
imKarenM

I meant to add:

Yours would be my initial reaction and it would take me a while to figure all of that out if I were in your shoes.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I would think it would have more to do with how much of a "chance" you gave different providers to help you. Did you stick with a program until you were sure it was a problem? Are you screening folks before you go see them? Are you seeing 2 docs at once? Most docs and insurance and probably the law don't count "alternative" treatments as legit. because insurance doesn't cover that stuff. I'm not saying they are right, just saying that's how it is. And I'd fire that lawyer if you are at a place where you can.
deleted_user
deleted_user

The only person going to take care of you is YOU....don't let this idiot stop you from trying to make your life better. I will keep looking for ways to feel better that fits in my morals...don't give up dear and we are here to talk too.
ozfm
ozfm

What an ass your lawyer is. I don't think there is any excuse for that treatment.
It's one thing to explain what to expect, but it's a totally different thing to yell at you and tell you to learn to live with it.

If there is any way you can, change lawyers. It is common to keep searching for assistance until you find some sort of solutions. I agree, it hardly sounds like you're drug seeking, it just sounds like someone who is in pain looking for answers. We all come across medical people like your lawyer, who don't believe or can't help you with your pain.
I wish you the best, and hope your case goes well.