Fibromyalgia Support Group

You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.

2 Online
2 Online

can it be fatal

My wife has been diagnosed recently and keeps talking about dying. I am so worried by this. Can Fibromyalgia be fatal. She has had symptoms for 20 years but no doc knew. In the end she went to a specialist in Norway and was diagnosed. Now she talks about the kids being alone if she dies. Please help. I dont know what to do. She broke her spine when she was 18 years old, but was "fixed". Could this be a reason for the Fibromyalgia?

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

As far as I know, Fibro is not fatal. It can be triggered by an injury however. It sounds like she's quite depressed. I'm sure that's difficult for you. Has she spoken with her doctor or a psychologist about the depression?
Stay strong
Alisson
deleted_user
deleted_user

I have never read that it is fatal. Painful and depressing.Hard to manage the changing symptoms and still keep functioning as normal. I have had it for 5 years and was only diagnosed 5 months ago.
It is not like ostioarthritis or reumatoid arthritis where there is deteriation with joints.
Hope this helps a bit.
hope she can get some meds to help her.
deleted_user
deleted_user

She is on sertraline and a benzodiazepine, but they really dont seem to work. iT WAS EXPLAINED TO ME HOW FIBRO FEELS BY A SPECIALIST AND I WAS JUST SO SHOCKED THAT PEOPLE HAVE TO LIVE AND MANAGE THIS PAIN. She didnt get on with the Psychologist, whom I know and can understand why, but I just want to help her to lose this fear of sudden death.
deleted_user
deleted_user

It was explained like this through a Net Specialist:

With your thumb and all four fingers, reach across your chest and firmly squeeze the back top of your shoulder muscle near the base of your neck.
Squeeze modestly, but until it hurtsand then squeeze a bit more.
Maintain that pressure. Now, consider living with that sensation, not just in your shoulder, but throughout your entire body, day after day, year after year. If you are able to do that, you will have some understanding of the quality of life of an individual who must endure the symptoms of fibromyalgia."

Is this an adequate description? I tried it and my shoulder still hurt an hour later.

I never knew she was in this kind of pain and wish I had as perhaps I could have helped her in a way that I didnt know how to.
fibrIC2
fibrIC2

God bless you for trying to help your wife! I too used to talk alot about my death, wanted to give away certain things to each child, consulted a funeral director for pre-planning, wrote notes to my family to be read after my death, etc. Went to a psychiatrist but he didn't help! I was taking Cymbalta and Elavil. I do not know if those meds contributed to my mental state--BUT I quit taking both of them because of other side effects. I NOW take Prozac and clonazepam. My mental state is much better, but my pain level is about the same.
Please let her know about this site and that she is NOT ALONE! Perhaps her doctor could evaluate her meds and try different ones until she feels better mentally. You've already helped her by contacting this site for support. There is much she can learn here about reducing her pain and feeling better!
May God bless your family!
deleted_user
deleted_user

I pray for her relief and strength always. I believe God does and will always give her strength. We are separated at present because of my own problems and lack of understanding, until now, of her pain. I can only ask forgiveness and offer my help to her now.
deleted_user
deleted_user

There are so many facets to fibro - depression, chronic pain that can put you in bed for days, fatigue (imagine the worst flu you've ever had and times it by 10), reactions to various meds, the inabilty to do the things you once did or want to do now and the list goes on. To generally find out about fibro with basic clear language I recommend "Fibromyalgia for Dummies". My husband read it and continues to refer to it when I talk about fibro issues. When the depression is really bad and out of control sometimes you feel like you want to die but I've never heard of anyone dying from fibro. Hope this helps...
deleted_user
deleted_user

Fibromyalgia is not fatal nor is it progressive , Depression on the other hand is a serious illness, if your wife is depressed please please please help her find a therapist she is comfortable with and encourage her to continue therapy, her primary doc or psychiatrist can try to work with her meds to find one that helps, Is her pain being properly managed? Does she use this site for support ? daily Strength has got me through some tough times, encourage your wife to reach out to others with the same diagnosis, God Bless you for being so supportive of her and trying to help her, please let us know how you are both doing...love and hugs
deleted_user
deleted_user

fibro is not fatal however some can have pain soooo bad that they feel like they are, however most of us no how to control things so it doesn't get to that point.
trish
deleted_user
deleted_user

I wish I had known as much as I Know now. It is probably too late for our relationship as i was one of those men that believed in "pull youself togetheer and get on with it"Since sept 2005. in have changed, i led a lifestyle that led me into a selfish state of alcoholism. which i battle again but i will always love her and help her. i help myself, but she took me from the despair of suicide to a "normal life", we are only together through God and Jesus, who is with us all, whether one likes it or not, always. Life is a gift, not a right, remember to give is always harder than to take. If anyone out there thinks that my views are GodCult, then think agian. was an atheiest until I saw my angel that had and still protects me in a way that not many will see. My faith anhd hope keeps others alive. Yours can do too. please dont give up. I have a didease that will kil me but I caused it myself by smoking LOTS,LOTS, Of cigarettes. Can I ask each one of you that readsthis to give a homeless person that you see within the next week a couple of dollars(in uk a 1) He/She may buy a beer oor a whatever, so what. JUST DO IT.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Fibro is not fatal. However there are serious side-effects of this illness. Many people are near the point of being bed-ridden (I have been there), and that will cause more and more problems, circulation, muscle deterioration, possible clot formation etc.. I do not believe in Cymbalta, it made me suicidal, and I don't think it's a good drug. They warn about it in teens but I am far from a teen, and read too many adults having much of the same problems. FM is a horrible illness, and the best way I can explain it.. is think of the worst flu you have ever had in your life. Think of how your muscles ached, you didn't want to move, it hurt to do ANYTHING! Most FM'ers have some variation of this type of pain every day. It can be to the extreme like that horrible flu, or it can be a mild pain, which is when we can function. What most don't understand is some days we function fine, it's the other days that people don't understand why we did it yesterday, and not today. Be patient with her, get her a therapist that will work - and some meds that will help her with the depression (which causes us to talk about death - usually). Be strong and I'm glad you are there for her. God Bless :)
deleted_user
deleted_user

You and your wife have found a great and supportive site.
I would def. find a doc, explain in detail what is going on, keep a journal, write down hourly, daily the pain, how bad it is, write everything detail down. I did that. I have also taken alot of info off this site to my rheumo. I am on percocet after bringing him info from this site. Before that he would only give me vicodin 500 mg for flare ups. Vicodin is like taking advil, it doesnt touch my pain,
the key to this is to find a doc that can help your wife. Alot of members here dont take narcotics, i refused narcotics for years but after being told by my doc that my pain will be as bad as it is with no relief i tried narcotics. I can tell u that i cannot get thru my day without my meds. As long as you take the does your doc recommends daily its easy to keep track and wont easily become addicted. I have been on many meds that are highly addicting, i am careful and have never become addicted. They get me thru my day, some days still worse than others but i am taking it day by day.
If you are not already try finding a pain management doc or rheumotologist. Anxiety and depression will cause severe flare ups.
Please update when u can.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Amen to Dream! It's interesting, I went to a site recently that discussed pain and the docs unwillingness to scribe them. They stated that people in chronic pain are about 1% likely to abuse. That's IT! 1% I take a lot of narcotics - Vicodin 10/325, Darvon N-100, Soma 350mg 3 x a day!! I recently needed an increase in my meds for a tooth ache, my doc allowed me to refill early, and then POOF I went right back down to 30 day refills. I am VERY careful to just be physically dependent and NOT addicted. There is a huge difference. GOOD LUCK in finding a doc that will listen :) Kathy
richannamae
richannamae

it can play a part in death there wear 2 women by me a few months back that they said they died from complications of fibro i am really bad and can relate im in bed 22 hrs a day and im only 37 i know they have ruled deaths from cfs as well hope this helps charlene
deleted_user
deleted_user

I have no advice. There's lot of support in this forum.

Laura
BB