First off, if those of u, dixie, death2me, socal, and a few others that dont like me and only want to cause trouble, please do not respond if you plan to respond negativly to me as i have been crying since 1:30 today at my rheumo apt, so please, i dont need any of u that surely hate me to respond. I need to vent and also to let some of u know what is going on in the medical world of fibro. What a slap in the face this to those of us that so badly want answers and help with this fibro pain.


I have been seeing this rheumo for over 2 years. He has always been wonderful to me. He put me on meds, including a narcotic. He has always cared about my pain and has tried to help me. My fibro has slowly progressed over the last 2 years. He has helped me to be able to work and take care of my 4 kids and hubby, most days.

I went to my scheduled rheumo apt. today with my regular journal of bad days in hand, when they start, good and bad weather days and how i feel on those days. This is something i do for every apt.

I get in there, have a great talk with the nurse, he comes in and asks how i am, etc. I tell him that i am in a flare right now and that the percocet isnt touching my pain. He said, what about taking u off all of your narcotics and only taking the neurontin and seroquil? The look on my face when he said that had to have been mortifiying. I was like, he did not just say this to me. I asked him, why do u say that? He said, i just got back a week ago from a medical conference in washington that was all about fibro. He said that it is now a proven fact that narcotics do not help fibro pain. The only med that has been proven to help fibro is lyrica. I explained to him that i tried lyrica, on 2 seperate occasions, and that the 2nd time i couldnt take it bcause it gave me severely bad headaches/migraines. I rarely get a headache. And i also rarely get a side affect from meds. So he tells me that i need to find something else to help me to deal with my fibro and my pain bcause eventually no rheumo's will be giving narcotics to their fibro patients. I was floored.
I sat in his office and cried for 40 minutes out of the hour i was in his room with him. He said that if i were to go to a bigger city, he said like, PA, CA, Florida that none of the rheumo's will give narcotics for fibro pain. He said they are all staying away from narcotics unless its for someone who is dying or say for someone having surgery, but no longer for fibro,i said to him, i dont understand what ur saying? I said, you put me on these meds, finally found something that works for me in the last 2 years and now u want to take it all away from me? I was crying like a flippin 3 year old trying to explain to him that i would not be able to get up and go to work, or function like i need to as a mom and worker at my job. I wouldnt be able to. I tried it for the month he did take me off of the ms contin and it was the worst month i had gone thru with pain in a very long time. He told me i need to join a fitness club and exercise several hours a day, what? ok if someone would like to add about 6 more hours into each day that would be great, oh and also someone else would have to fit the $400.00 membership bill as that is out of our league, and i told him that. I said to him, look, i told u the day i first walked in here, i didnt expect to be pain free, however i need to be able to tolerate my pain to work and take care of my family. Of which isnt happening right now as im in a flare.
I am just so stunned. This to me is a slap in the face to all of us with fibro. I have tried other things for my pain other than meds over the last 15 years, did the all natural route, the meds were too expensive and didnt work.I also did PT and exercise several years ago when i was seeing a pain doc. The exercises made my pain in my arms, neck and shoulders so much worse. I missed alot of work during that time.
I sat out in the parking lot for half an hour today after my apt., called hubby at work,he drove the 45 minutes to come get me bcause i was crying so hard i couldnt see to drive.
So he did refill my ms contin this time, refilled my xanax, that he just upped the dose of last apt, told me i can now take 1 1/2 xanax instead of 1 and he is trippling my neurontin. He gave me a script of provogil but the pharmacy couldnt fill it bcause my insurance needs to talk directly to my rheumo so he can tell them personally why im taking the provogil so that wont be ready until at least friday.

He had me sit on the bed, poked and prodded at all my trigger points ans sore spots, he had me hold up my arms, i couldnt hold them up without them shaking from the severe pain ive been in with this flare.

I asked him to look back in my chart, every season change i go thru this, ive been going to him long enough i'd think he'd at least look, but he didnt. He is the last rheumo on our insurance i can see. There are also no other rheumo's or pain docs anywhere around here that treat fibro.

I thought that after the lyrica was approved and the commercials started showing up on TV, that just maybe this would be a positive thing for us. But im not sure now. I didnt want to question him anymore, as i felt i already questioned him on several things and he did get a bit irritated from the tone of his voice, but i sure would like to have seen this proof that narcotics do not help with fibro pain.
I asked him about the med aspire started, he said its basically the same thing as ms contin. He also told me that if he took half the ms contin that i took he would be laying outcold on the floor, mind u he is twice my size, and im not big by no means. I felt insulted and feel like im back to square one with no doc and no one to help me.

I just do not understand how, after 2 years and how supportive he has been to me, has cared about getting my pain under control etc, and now this.

Perhaps a gravel truck will cross the center line tommorow in front of me on my way to work. I couldnt be that flippin lucky.

I am not a cryer and still havent been able to stop crying.

Thank u to my friends that read all of this.