My father died when I was 10. My mother had mental health problems and regular told me it was my fault. She spent a lot of time in hospital and from about 12 I was home alone most of the time. I am now 27 but still have nightmares about when she would self harm in front of me. Our relationship (and her mental health) got better when I had my first son and she died shortly aftter but I cannot forgive her or 'get over it' My family is large but not at all close and I resent a lot of them as they didn't try to help me when I needed them. When my father was alive he was an alcoholic. I feel very alone and I envy people that have families they get on with and actually like. How do I heal?
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