I am divorced after 32 years of marriage and now live with my boyfriend of two years. We both have daughters who are 10 months apart in age - my daughter turned 12 in December and his daughter will be 13 this month. My boyfriends daughter lives with us 3 out of 7 days a week and the girls refer to each other as sisters. We have gone to various family events which included my daughters cousin who is 13. A little background: My daughter is not mean and has never done anything to either of them. She is kind of a quite girl who I think has some social anxiety issues I think which keeps her reserved and quite. My daughter is incredibly smart and has high honors in school and is not interested in boys yet, makeup or girly stuff. She however does not have any close real friend that she hangs out with or even talks with outside of school. On the other hand my boyfriends daughter thinks she is the cats meow, is always on the phone with friends, has lots of friends she hangs out with, has a boyfriend, is very girly.
My boyfriends daughter became friendly with my daughters cousin - they have probably been together at 6 or so family gatherings. They would hang out talk but not really invite my daughter to be included who was also there. They would go on walks, go in the house and hang but not ask my daughter to join. Yes, my daughter could have just joined in but didn't - I try to encourage her but I think she needs to almost be invited. My daughter says she really doesn't have anything in common with them and feels funny. The cousin has come to my house for my dauther's birthday party and the cousin and my boyfirends daughter will just go upstairs to my boyfriends daughter's room and not even ask my daughter. During one cookout my boyfriend's daughter was invited to a birthday party which included my daughter's cousin in which my daughter was not even asked. Again, this killed me.
THE REASON FOR THE POST: Plans were made over a week ago for my boyfriends daughter to go to the mall with friends to hang and see a movie - completely fine. Last night when my boyfriend picked his daughter up he discovered that the friends included my daughter's cousin. My daughter was not asked. My boyfriend asked his daughter if she invited Katelyn and his daughter said no. He said you should of, after all it is her cousin and you are her sister. I was not home to witness this but apparently my boyfriends daughter asked my daughter and my daughter said no. This enrages me that my daughter is being left out. I tried to encourage my daughter to go to include herself and put herself out there so she won't be left out so that she can build relationships so she will be included. She comes back and says "As far as I know I wasn't even INVITED. When J (My boyfriend's daughter) came home she said she was going to the movies with friends and that as long as she asked me and I said no she wouldn't get in trouble for not allowing me to go". She then went on to say did you see how happy J was when I said no. My thoughts: Really though, why would you say yes after it seemed like a sympathy invite.
Am I right or wrong that this is wrong on so many levels. My daughter is adopted has lost her birthfamily, divorced and lost her dad full time (see him maybe an hour a week), only has me, my mother, my boyfriend, my boyfriends daughter, and her aunt, uncle and cousin (the person in this story). It bothers me that they don't try harder to include her. Maybe if they say K come on over when they are hanging out or when they get up to go hang in the house say "we are going in the house to hang come join us we will have fun". If they go for a walk instead of just walking off say "we are going for a walk why don't you join us K" or her sister could say "we are planning to go to the movies next week and hang at the mall. Come with us K, we'll have fun. If K says no, "Awww, comeon you gotta go your cousin will be there, please come".
Any advise would be greatly appreciated. This is taring me up inside. I don't know how to handle this. To me it is just wrong on so many levels. It's like emotional bullying in your own home. This is the beginning of this - the second thing she wasn't invited to. I can only imagine sleepovers, other parties, hang outs, great relationships that will not include my daughter with her own family. HELP!!
acuriousfish 03/20/2019ok, Mrs Fish has found out that when an account is hijacked it first sends out a bunch of friend requests. Only after adding a few friends does it add the sex spam.So there is no way of being able to tell if you get a friend request if it's a hijacked account or not. However you should be able to work out that if they have not posted anything for a year or so it may be...
I'm reposting this from acuriousfish and thanks fish!! acuriousfish 03/20/2019ok, Mrs Fish has found out that when an account is hijacked it first sends out a bunch of friend requests. Only after adding a few friends does it add the sex spaSo there is no way of being able to tell if you get a friend request if it's a hijacked account or not. However you should be able to work out that if...