
Family & Friends of Cancer Patients Support Group
This community is dedicated to parents, siblings, grandparents, other relatives, friends and caretakers of cancer patients. It's difficult to find a safe place to talk about caring for a loved one with cancer, and so this group serves as an open forum to foster positivity and support for those going through this tough time.

deleted_user
You know we never are ready to hear the news that our Mother is Dying and we only have so much time to spend with her. One day she is helping me out with my kids and enjoying life. She had just retired and 1-2 weeks later she went in because she was having major side pain. When she wen in they couldn't do anything until they did a CT Scan. When they did it they had her come in again and told her she has Ovarian Cancer. It was so advanced they had her in surgery within 3 days. We all stood around and waited in the waiting room hoping for some good news.
They wheeled her out and it looked like the shell of my lovely Mother on a bed. The Doctor took us to the family room and let us know it was bad. They took out part of her Interstines, Omentum, Ovaries, Diaphram, and still didn't get it all. She has Cancer in her pelvic cavity and the rest they left was inoperable. Why....why couldn't they fix it all. We have been able to go to the moon, cure many other sickness's and conquer the world but not this Cancer stuff.
I am not sure what to think. You know I think in a way I am being selfish. I want my Mom back to the person she was. I want my Mother to be there to see my children grow up. To be able to give me advice for when they are teenagers. To be there to see me succeed at something anything. I want to die before her! I know that is not the normal order of life but this is not what I was expecting at 28 years old. There is still too much I need to know and want to do with my Mom. I want to take back all the mean things I had said or done but I can't.
Yesterday she had gone in for another Chemo treatment. Her CI125 cells when up a lot. I think if there was only one thing I could do for my Mom is for her not to feel anymore pain.
I have done nothing but cry and I want to talk to my Mom about it but I know that I have to be strong for her. If I show her that I am in pain then she will worry about me and it will make her more sick. What do you do? I am such a mess. It is like all of this goes in waves. Some days I am okay other days I am crying over something simple. How to do this? What to do to make this easier? I just needed to get this off my chest.
Yvette
Daughter of Kathy age 58 End Stage Cancer
They wheeled her out and it looked like the shell of my lovely Mother on a bed. The Doctor took us to the family room and let us know it was bad. They took out part of her Interstines, Omentum, Ovaries, Diaphram, and still didn't get it all. She has Cancer in her pelvic cavity and the rest they left was inoperable. Why....why couldn't they fix it all. We have been able to go to the moon, cure many other sickness's and conquer the world but not this Cancer stuff.
I am not sure what to think. You know I think in a way I am being selfish. I want my Mom back to the person she was. I want my Mother to be there to see my children grow up. To be able to give me advice for when they are teenagers. To be there to see me succeed at something anything. I want to die before her! I know that is not the normal order of life but this is not what I was expecting at 28 years old. There is still too much I need to know and want to do with my Mom. I want to take back all the mean things I had said or done but I can't.
Yesterday she had gone in for another Chemo treatment. Her CI125 cells when up a lot. I think if there was only one thing I could do for my Mom is for her not to feel anymore pain.
I have done nothing but cry and I want to talk to my Mom about it but I know that I have to be strong for her. If I show her that I am in pain then she will worry about me and it will make her more sick. What do you do? I am such a mess. It is like all of this goes in waves. Some days I am okay other days I am crying over something simple. How to do this? What to do to make this easier? I just needed to get this off my chest.
Yvette
Daughter of Kathy age 58 End Stage Cancer
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But you can't change anything from the past now. She is in God's hands. Your relationship should be as it always was. Don't "force" things. That won't work.
Be around for her whenever you can. But don't try to "repair any wrongs" just because she is ill. Tell her, honestly, that you are so sorry for anything that happened between the two of you in the past. Forgive her. And forgive yourself.
I hope that your mom is around for a long time, but not with terrible pain. Understand that this is a tragic disease but it is not punishment for a bad life or anything else. It strikes rich and poor, old and young, famous and ordinary people.
Try to find strength here at Daily Strength and always know that people here care about you and will try to help any way we can.
You will be in my prayers.