Hi Judy, I know how horrible the combination of alcoholism and bipolar can be. It sounds like you are being very strong supporting her like that. I think that unless she can kick the alcohol and get her meds under control you are in for a very bumpy road. Good luck, I hope someone else has some better advice for you!

Tracey.

its good that you're there for them. I know it can be so taxing of your time. But for them to to call on you the most means they feel safe letting into the dark world of her disorder.

She does need help to clean up she will never get better as long as she' tippin the bottle

Oh, Judy, my heart aches for you. She needs professional help, maybe even a hospitalization to get her on the road to recovery.

You could try calling the local mental health clinic nearest you and asking them where you might find a "dual recovery" group or a "double trouble" AA group.

When there is a combined diagnosis, they really need special help. Addressing only the substance abuse will cause her to disregard and undertreat her bipolar disorder; treating only the bipolar will not have much effect on her at all.

All mental health clinics, either state run or private, should be able to give you resource information on what is available in your area.

I am a bit surprised that while in rehab they havent treated her for both?? Anyway her PDoc should be able to help with a co-commitment plan for her.

I really feel for you as that is very hard to deal with. How is her son taking all this or does he understand what is going on? I don't mean to offend with this next question but is your son having issues taht he can't help her or something? Why is this falling more on your shoulders? I am just curious and I hope I am not being offensive in asking.

i want to thank everyone for your comments, no i am not offended at all by what was said. when i took her down for bi-polar the last time, she was so drunk that they refused admittance. i had to take her to the hospital first for medical clearance first. the has even been to places for 6 weeks and upon coming home, starts drinking and not taking meds. she does she a therapist everyother week but nothing seems to help her. my son just accepts it as it is. my grandson, their son, is only 7. but i am sure he knows what is going on. he doesnt talk about her very much and i dont bring it up. my son knows that this girl has severe mental illness but continues to let her remain there. i know love is funny, but to me this is torture to have to live this way! i dont know how much longer i can keep supporting her this way as then i am an enabler!! something that i really hate about myself. thanks for listening. love judy

Thanks for filling in the blanks a bit Judy. To be honest your son needs to step up to the plate a heck of a lot more and not be putting his responsibilities on you. To be quit blunt you are more enabling him than her. She has a mental illness that is out of control AND a substance abuse issue that is exacerbating the problem. What is your son's reason for not stepping up to the plate?

I know I am probably over stepping my bounds but arent you raising thier child already? Your son needs to get his act together as this is the mother of his child and get her help or help out as much as possible.

I would suggest you pull back and start taking care of you! For goodness sakes you have to put yourself first as you are raising thier son and your health and well being is the hope for thier child.

If the dynamic isnt changed nothing will ever change. I can't even begin to offer insight on how to get her better treatment but your son should be handling that, not you. It is not your responsibility. They already gave you a bigger one in raising thier child.