I am abslolutly fed up I feel a stranger in my own home, my husband is there in body but ignores me I neednt be here. He has started to sleep down stairs on the sofa, his choice I suppose. I needed some companionship and so yesterday I spent the afternoon down at my daughters i had a bit of fun with the grandchildren. I am sick of it all and whatever I say or do I am stil getting criticised. I know I shouldnt take things personal but I feel like a stranger to my husband. There seems nothing left. Today i went to work at 8.15 finished at 5.30 went to see to my mam as I had to give her a bath. I telephoned my husband 3 times got no answer. Came home felt like a stranger no communication, nothing I just felt as though I need not have come home. I said to my husband i need some companionship and he just grunted I said I may as well go back out rather than be ignored, so I went to see an old friend she is elderly and always makes me welcome. When I arrived she said my husband had been down today and he had said to her that "Yvonne thinks I am ill and I spend to much money, he also said that I spend all my time in the bedroom. I explained to our friend that he wasnt well and suffers from bipolar, she said he seemed fine when he was here he is a great man. This makes me feel auful and it is as if my husband things I am the problem. Well I had a cuppa with my friend i dont think she really understood but never mind. My husband had also been saying things to my daughter about me in not a positive light I am sick of it. I came in at 10.00pm tonight there is no communication or anything, I asked my husband if he wanted a cup of tea and he said no. He is laying down on the sofa again tonight no doubt he will sleep there just like last night. I dont know how much longer this is going to go on for but I am so sick of it. I am desperate for some sort of connection but dont get any and if i mention anything I am just nagging or criticising because everything i say gets conscrewed. I think my friend is questioning me after what he has said as she did make a real fuss of him. What can I do I feel as though I am in an empty marriage and my husband is the one who is criticising me. Its awful because all I want to do is make the home a nice place to be and its not. Dont know how much more I can take. Sorry for whinning but I need to get it off my chest I hope you dont mind. Any communication would be welcome.
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