Today was probably one of the saddest day in my life. After months and months of court dates, plea deals, a date when he was to be taken away and then changed at the last minute, he finally had to self report. We spent the day together, thinking about our future, watching TV, having lunch, and then it was time to drop him off. I kept it together pretty good until he stepped out of the car to walk into the jail with many others that had to self report. Seeing him walk away, hands in pockets (he always does that, even though I told him not to) was the saddest thing. He looked back again as I was driving off, and that is when the tears started rolling. I realized that I would not be able to call or text him as I have done for the last 4-1/2 years every day. He could not call me to make sure i made it home safe, and I came back to our bedroom. I am wondering what he is doing right now, what his days will be like, and is a feeling that I don't wish upon anyone. He knows my daily routine, but I don;t know what he is doing. I got home and my sister had bought me a smiley face huge balloon and Reeses Peanut butter cups for every week he will be gone. I am so glad for a great family, but I miss him more than words can explain. All of you are such help to get through this, and I will never leave this board, hoping that I can be someone that will help people on this board. That said, I will have to finish my glass of wine, go to sleep and wait for tomorrow….one day at a time.
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