Chris-my baby's dad is incarcerated for some bullshit, he is a P.V. (parole violator) and has an 18 month hit with no new case, all because of what his ex says, oh and plus after he was already in handcuffs they searched his apartment and found a machete (that was totally stupid on his part, but not the reason he was being arrested in the first place). I love Chris and I want to be able to be here for him, but it's so damn hard, sometimes I just get so frustrated because he isn't here helping me raise our baby! I pray everyday that he gets out on post-release just so he is able to be a better father to our baby boy. I do go and see him as much as possible, but financially, it's hard. He's not that far away, but I don't have a vehicle, and gas prices are crazy these days (I have to pay someone to take us..which is understandable!). He told me yesterday on the phone that everyday that goes by is a day closer to his release, which helped alot. I'm suppose to be the strong one, and I never let him know the pain and stress it's causing me, he has no idea how hard this is for me to deal with! I don't want him to know how bad I'm suffering too, just because I don't want to make it harder for him and make him feel more guilty than he already does. I'm always the one lifting his spirits and telling him everything will be ok, when there are times when I don't feel that way at all.
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