To say that yesterday sucked would be the understatement of the world... I was out at a coaching clinic when I received like 10 back to back text messages from K.P. She went on and on about how she can never tell me anything because I "share that information with everyone in the world through facebook, myspace, etc.." I wrote her back and explained that what she was accusing me of simply wasn't true. All I said on my last facebook entry in the little mood section was, "L.C. is trying not to be too upset or disappointed." She took that as me telling everyone under the sun that she was drinking again, which is why I was so bummed out. I told her that my statement was completely vague and nobody could possibly know what I was referring to unless they stopped and asked me. (not that I would tell them the truth anyway) Moving right along, I called her as I was driving back home and she was crying and really upset. It was after about 10 minutes I realized that she was totally WASTED again. She had been sober for 2 weeks, then got drunk on Thursday night, was fine on Friday and Saturday, but then was drunk off her ass by 1PM Sunday. We fought on and off all day long. She didn't want me to be there at the house with her because I should've been "out having fun" with my friends, not sitting at home being sad and miserable with her. Although that is somewhat true, I just couldn't do that. I wanted to be there for her and prove to her that I wasn't going to give up on her again like I did last year when we broke up. (That's another long story) She said that she wasn't good enough for me and that I deserved better. She said that she didn't think she could "be the person I wanted her to be". . . And that she could never truly make me happy. Everything she said just broke my heart. It was a really sad sight. So far she made it to one AA meeting, and PROMISED up and down that she would get the help she needed and do whatever it took to make our relationship work. I just don't know what to do anymore. I finally left last year after giving her a million chances to clean up her act, and ironically she did. But she did it while we were broken up; didn't drink or smoke for almost 3 months! Started working out religously and taking really good care of herself. However, a few weeks after we got back together and decided to give it another try she went to Vegas and L.A. with a few of her friends, and well, you can say it was all down hill from there. I do love her with all my heart, but I want to have children and live with someone I can grow old happily with. I want that person to be her, but I am wise enough to know that a leopard never changes its spots. . . Damn. I need some advice. Help if you can. Thank you!
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