Pick up the book, "Learning To Live Again", at your library. The first few chapters give the reader a real Layman's read about alcholism, how it is determined, how it is a disease, etc....

He could be an alcoholic...
He could be an 'abuser' but not dependant or necessarily physically addicted...
He could be addicted phychologically but not chemically...

Do you believe he is an alcoholic? Outside of the occassions you mention above, is his planning always inclusive of alcohol? Does he become angry if it is not available to him?

There are so many things to look at...

my gut says yes....and im fearful as i so dont want this in my life......its been around me since i was a kid....ive seen it destroy people,relationships......lives....i dont want to believe it.......im not that strong

Janiece, I am sorry for your struggles. I know this is painful. If someone has to drink that often, I suspect there is a problem. As Maia said, he could be abusing alcohol. People don't always see the clear picture in the beginning until the disease progresses, and it does.

It is just my opinion, but I would be asking myself why would the man in my life rather drink with his buddies than come home? And also, what does that mean for my future.

The best thing you can do is to set boundaries for "you." Be clear about what you want and what you can and cannot live with. I was told, that there are now more than one kind of alcoholic that they can identify.

And the other thing that makes sense to me, is if a drinking causes someone a problem, then we at least know they have a drinking problem.

Keep working on your life, what you want, and come here and post often. We all understand..
Blessings..
EllaBlue

i think thats why im so sad.....because now my life is changing......now i hafto be aware,or responsible for things that i didnt before......theres goes my safety net......wow...im so overwhelmed ..i cant think straight....