Hey, I am married to a very sweet man that I love very much, I know he loves me also, but he just happens to be an addict..... He doesn't really have just one addiction, just addicted to getting high, he prefers prescription drugs, usually loracet, methadone and xanex, but he has used meth, and when hes really desperate he will smoke weed or drink. His biggest problem is the xanex, because when he does them, he just can't seem to stop, and he is a completely different person when he uses them. He is physically and mentally abusive, he steals, lies, cheats and just completely makes an ass of himself. He humiliates me when hes like that, yet I stay with him, and if I do leave him, when he gets straight and starts making me all the I'll never do it again promises, I want so bad to believe him,,, yet I'm always looking over my shoulder, tryin to catch him up in a lie, or waiting for him to disappoint me and use again, the problem is he always does. Two days ago, while I was gone to take my son to my mothers to spend the night, he went with a friend of his, when I got home and found him gone, I automatically got mad, cause I knew what was going on, when he got home, I could tell he was high, and as the night went on, he just got worse, then all day yesterday he was high, and don't remember anything, I was so mad that I just wanted to smack him, to try to shake some sense into him,,,, I just can't understand why anyone would throw their whole life away for a buzz that they can't even remember, and now he keeps denying he was on anything, like I'm too stupid to tell the difference when hes high and when hes not,,, and acts like i have no reason what so ever to be upset with him,,,, that just makes me more upset... Is there any hope??? and can anyone suggest any thing to keep from getting so mad, I have actually developed hypertension because of it, and had a Dr tell me that if I didn't learn to stay calm, I was going to have a stroke,,,, OMG I am just so frustrated at him,,, any suggestions
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