Well - it is day 5 since I found out for the millionth time that my husband cannot do what he says he will do. He told me two weeks ago that he would not take anymore pain pills (he has said this quite a few times in the last few years) and I come home from a trip on Sunday night and I knew immediately that he had taken something. But evidently it is OK, since he is taking it as prescribed - Yeah, that's gonna last. So, I asked him to figure out what he was going to do and to do it, I can no longer continue to play this game where he says it will be different and nothing changes. I continue to sacrifice myself to keep our family together and I am so tired of it. He came up with some stuff, but is upset with me because I am not immediately OK with everything - big deal he made a couple of calls, has he gone to any meetings, talked to anyone, STOPPED TAKING MEDS - NO! I am always that one that moves towards him after he disappoints me. Why doesn't he ever persue me? He stopped that, the day we got married! I am frustrated, angry, fedup, confused, lonely (I cannot talk to anyone, I feel stupid for allowing to this to have gone on so long), overworked, unappreciated and TIRED (we just found out that I am pregnant with our third child), probably not the best timing! I do not a divorce, because I love him and I know that he can be a better person and because I am a christian and I made a promise. But how do things change We keep doing the same things over and over again.
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