I'm not really sure if this community is where I fit in, but it seems to be the most appropriate. My husband recently had a psychotic episode followed by a manic episode, completely out of the blue. Dr's aren't absolutely sure what triggered it, but he has used marijuana long term and admitted that he has a problem with it, so that appears to be the focal point. He is on meds and recovering well but he's far from ok. I am struggling with the fact that he is far from his "old" self and may never get there. We have a 15 month old and I am 6 months pregnant. Normally, he is a huge support, a giving, sweet and gorgeous man. I am having trouble coming to terms with having a husband who can't be relied upon at all right now. Although people are offering a lot of help to me, we have no family or close friends where we live so it's really hard to cope and I do feel isolated. I haven't felt comfortable with any of the professionals I've spoken to and I feel like my family & friends can only take so much. I understand that it is best for him if I am appearing to cope and be happy, but at times, I just can't fake it. It is so hard not being able to bear my emotions to the only person I feel comfortable doing that with. I think I've gone through every possible human emotion over the last month and it has drained me beyond belief. I obviously worry about my pregnancy but the worst feeling is the sudden uncertainty about my future and the knowledge that he could have further episodes. I am doing everything I can to take care of myself, but this situation is extreme to me - we're not the sort of people who normally have crises! This was the last thing I would have ever imagined happening to us and while I've pretty much stopped wishing it didn't happen, I'm a long way from feeling alright. Is there anyone who has gone through anything similar?? Any pearls of wisdom??
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