Last time My husband touched crack was 3months ago, I know a very short time. He has managed to get a job and a good one and is doing very good. He know's I want to move out and get a place to live on my own I have been staying with my parents. I have mixed emotions right now with him. Part of me loves him and part of me hates him for everything I have been thru with him. We have been out together, just doing little things, dinner, washing clothes together, movies, and he even went to church with me. I am so mixed up right now because I have it, I love being able to just do what ever I want and no drama. Yesterday he turned his phone off for about two hours and that trigger me to loose it with him.....He tried so hard to keep calling me and kept asking me what was wrong. It just brought back so many memories of all the bad stuff that I told him yesterday I do not want to be hurtful to him but I have no trust at all. Little things will trigger me with him and I just do not know how to turn that off. I haft to say I have never seen someone try so hard to please another person like he has been doing with me and it's driving me crazy on what I want to do, divorce or stay with him. I know Crack addict's will sell you, trust me I can be a smartass right back at him... I have come backs to everything he hits me with, like I told him I learned them from him. I just do not want to be sold again into his crap, just to loose everything again. I have had one friend on here tell me to wait one year and just sit back and watch and see what he does, maybe this will work. What's sad with me is that in the bottom of my stomach I feel like I am just waiting for him to relaspe again, then that gives me the excuse to just divorce. I hate being this way but I feel it. Sorry you guys I am just so confused at this time.
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