I have been in 7 month relationship with a really kind hearted guy. he is a self confessed binge drinker over the past 15 years-never drinks alone, but life of the party type with lots of friends. He came back from studying abroad, did a career change, wanted to get out of the rut he found himself in of working 14 hour days and partying hard on his days off. When we met he was just back and looking for a new job as a teacher in his home town... ( known for their beer consumption) He and his family would tell me how he has quieted down over the past few years- but... he got caught for a DUI in Sept ( lots of shame there). At first he did really well and i told him that I dont' judge him for the DUI but I will judge for how he handles it. He has taken full responsibility for it and does not make excuses for himself. He can go weeks without a drink and can have 1 or 2 at times, but when he crosses that line and decides to get drunk... he has no impulse control.. at all. I have struggled with the alcohol thing from the very beginning and have always just assumed he was a heavy drinker when he drank. We went on a trip and got delayed in the airport for 24 hours... he decided to sit at the bar and he drank about 15 beer over the course of 6 hours.. i was so upset and tried not to show it .. makes it worse.. i was scarred that he was going to get arrested ... he was life of the party at the bar but showed not control when we left the airport, really hyper...I dont' think it is ok for my boyfriend to get that drunk in an airport! To make a long story short.. we got back and he got a letter from the lawyer stating that his trial is going to court and does not look good. Meaning he could lose his kob, license and get a criminal record. His family labels him the back sheep and i have always felt that he has never had anyone really believe in him. now he has shut me out .... and will not let me in, stating he has no time and has to finish construction on his house.... i have tried to talk with him.. feel i should walk but then again I feel like he is rather alone. Maybe it is just the nurse in me. how much crap is too much crap?
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