Families & Friends Affected By Suicide Support Group

Suicide affects not only the individual, but also the family and friends who provide support and love. This community is offered as a place for those affected by suicide to gather and gain strength from each other. PLEASE NOTE: If you are suffering from suicidal thoughts, please take advantage of our CRISIS RESOURCES, which you can find at the bottom of every page of the...

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/ Families & Friends Affected By Suicide Support Group

how?

deleted_user
deleted_user
ok I have a question and this has been running thru my mind every single day.I was with my finacee for almost 8 years, and he always reminded me of how much he loved me, ( I would say I love you to him and he would always say back to me, I love you MORE, how could he do this to me and hurt and leave me if he loved me so much?? I remember a few months ago (before he died) I was depressed one night, thinking about my mother that passed and just wanted to die and go be with her, as I was talking to him, he said to me Tammy, how would I feel if you did that? God put you on this earth to love me, he then told me if you left me I would be headed right behind you..... now how come he thought it was ok for him to leave me the way he did , but it was not ok for me to leave him? I am totally hurt and lost
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have come to the conclusion I will never get all the answers I want about suicide. I do my best to understand, but I am not in "that" mind set, I do not have that type of pain. To me, there would be nothing that would make me end my life and destroy my family, but that just is not the case for some. I have to go with my gut and believe my sister was ill, truly sick as if it was a disease. It is the only way I have learned to cope the way I have. It is not fair, none of us should have had to loose a loved one this way, and again, i am very sorry for your pain and loss.
ihart
ihart
Sometimes the mind takes us to a really dark place and when we don't see any light @ all it can happen that we chose to die . I have no explanation for your fiance. Often when people have drug or alcohol problems they are less rational
I am so sorry that you are experiencing this pain now and I would like to offer my condonlences.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Obviously I'm not one to know, having never felt it myself, but having lost my guy to suicide and feeling pretty confident how I knew him, I'd venture to say that people who reach that point aren't thinking about the rest of us- the choice has nothing whatsoever to do with us and whether they love us, it has to do with escape from terrible pain. I am very sorry for your loss.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know it is difficult and none of us will ever get the answers we want and need. I agree with everyone here, we never had that mind set and darkness. It had nothing to do with us. They were not in a rational state of mind to even think of what they were leaving behind. It is so terrible to know they were in so much pain and darkness...they are now free from that pain and in peace. I know this does not lighten your heavy heart, but do know he did love you...he told you so!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I use to wonder, and sometimes still do, how come my brother could do it...hang himself. Was I that bad that he didn't want to be around me anymore. Yet, he was not himself, drugs man..I hate them.
JacquB52
JacquB52
I'm with the rest of the people that responded to this post. I tried to figure things out...for years and years. It almost drove me crazy. Then one day I finally figured out...I would never really know. The problem is that we are trying to apply things that make sense to us...to a flawed mindset...an unbalanced person. What makes sense to them...would never make sense to us. So we are never going to know. As hard as that is to hear..it's the truth. It was hard to give up my quest for finding out what I called 'the truth'. But when I abandon the quest...I realized I was actually healing. We never get over these things totally, but we can heal and not be so consumed by this senseless act.

Take care and hang in there...it does get marginally better. I promise.

Jackie
deleted_user
deleted_user
Honey I am right with you! My husband took his own life 4 months ago. He actually kissed me and walked away and killed himself for me to find him an hour later. I have learned that it is you it was them! God Bless!
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