My doctor did tell me that Lupron was my only option and that it wouldn't be that bad. I had time to research it a little before the first shot was given to me. However, the information that is available to read, does not go into detail about all of the side effects. It only lists some of them. Knowing that I would be put into chemical menopause was scarey, but I was told that I had no other options. So, I did it.

Right after I got my shot, I drove home. I felt disoriented and dizzy right away, but I knew that one of the possible side effects was dizziness and so I didn't think much of it at the time. During the first month, I continued to experience all of the same problems that I had prior to the lupron, besides the bleeding. I also gained the side effects of sleep difficultites/bad dreams/joint pain/fatigue/headaches/hotflashes/night sweats.

After my second shot, I continued to have pain, which turned into spasming, which originated in my pelvis, what I was told was probably bladder spasms. It was continuous for over 24 hours, so I went to see my doctor who didn't really believe me, but gave me a mild anti-spasmatic pill to take and some pain medication to only take if nothing else helped...and only at night, as it would make me drowsy. During this time, I began to have emotional issues such as depression/aggression/anxiety/nervousness. It got so out of hand that I was put on an add back therapy shortly after to help. It did help "numb" these feelings, but did not make it go away.

After my third shot, I was told to just come back in three months for a follow up, as I had so many problems that I told my doctor that I would never take another shot again. He said at the time that he didn't blame me for not wanting any more...and was actually suprised that I even took the last injection. This said to me five minutes after I got my last shot.....yea....nice....Anyhow, the third month was much of the same; pain, with little relief, continued spasms, joint pain, fatigue, emotional/mental issues...to name a few things. I was also not told at the time that it takes just about as long as you take Lupron for it to "leave your system"; meaning that you will not have a period for as long as you were on the shot...for me, it lasted just under three months since my last shot.

During that three months, I had an experience while driving with my children in the car. I had a weird surge of energy (the only way I can explain it), start at the top of my head, go down my face, down into my chest, down into my pelvis and then disappear. As this feeling hit my face, my eyes went black. I could not see. I pulled over to the side of the road and tried not to freak out.My right eye vision came back sooner than my left eye. My left eye continued to be black for what seemed like forever in a very short amount of time. I was freaked out, but saw a fast food place up ahead...I had just eaten, but didn't know what else to do. I got a drink...thinking I was thirsty maybe...and continued to drive. I called my husband and mother, who both told me to not worry about it and just drive home (I was about 20 minutes away at the time). So, I did.

This exact experience has not happend since then, however I continued to have many difficulties with driving. I would feel intoxicated, even though I most definetly was not, nearly everytime I was driving. I felt dizzy and out of control. Then it continued to get worse. My left eye especially goes blurry every day now. I have black outs/black spots/lights flickering and double vision. I have dimmed vision now with loss of periphrial vision. All cannot be explained. No one has even tried.

On top of that, when I started bleeding again, I bled for 27 days straight, mostly if I became stressed. I have bowel issues that are causing me so much trouble that I am scheduled for a colonoscopy and GI probe in a couple of weeks. My joint pain continues every single day, including spasms/twitches/jerking movements, especially in my legs.

I am now taking anti-depressants because of the depression/anxiety.

All of this in the past year has put me life into a whirlwind. No doctors have any answers for me and I am often told that it is all in my head...and that it isn't that bad....believe me it is. My marriage has suffered, my relationships with my friends and family have suffered. And nobody believes me. It's like someone completly shut me out of the life that I was having before. I'm desperately trying to find a solution to all of this. I have many appointments with various different doctors and will continue to see anyone who will see me to get the answers that I deserve.

I'm sorry to be so descriptive. But I hope that this does not happen to anyone else. If that is the only thing that I get out of sharing my story...atleast I could get that much.