o earlier this year I posted about an experience I had with a gifted psychic that shared with me that my boyfriend had betrayed my trust in the past with a chick and that even though he sees her once in a while he will see her again and she saw the girl becoming pregnant but she did not see that baby living on (miscarriage). When I asked her why he would do such a thing if I can not picture him going that far and he loves me more than i love him she said that for a while I had not been meeting his needs emotionally, physically and sexually. This I know was true. I know I had neglected him a bit mainly because I was so confused about life, tired with hormonal issues and getting frustrated with him about other things. Well, I became SOOOOO over worked at the possibility that this could be true based on the lack of faith I have in my man because he seems a bit insecure most of the time. A couple of months later I went to another psychic that was MUCH more empowering and clear. She told me that my boyfriend did not sexually cheat but rather in the past he wavered in his commitment to me emotionally with some one he met through mutual friends. She said she saw that there was chemistry there but that it was more codependant. When I asked her what she meant by codependant because i am imagining drugs, she said it was "emotional". To me this made sense, because my boyfriend is one that needs alot of validation to boost his ego. However I will say he is introverted and doesn't naturally go out of his way to talk to people, even when I have spotted him at a bar before going up to him. He's more of a loner you could say. ....but it really pissed me off at the thought of him not addressing me not meeting his needs but rather suprisingly meeting some other chick through mutual friends and hitting it off with her imaginig how amazing she is and comparing her to me because im not meeting his needs? Does that sense? I personally would tell him straight up if he hasn't been meeting my needs and work on fixing it so it really bothers me that he wouldn't do the same :( In fact, a long time ago when he was not making enough love to me I talked to himabout it in a loving, firm and compassionate way. Initially he fixed himself and then went slightly back to his old ways.
So anyway this whole "emotional" connection thing he had with some chick still bothers me even though the psychic lady told me it was not sexual. Why? Well because after the reading i asked him to tell me if there was ever a time he felt very attracted to someone or some one hit on him and he felt uncomfortable telling me sort of thing. He said NEVER of course. Now I don't see him telling me the whole truth because evn tho i feel he cares about me i know he's the avoidant type and would never want to hurt my feelings. Plus he knows I'd be upset and ask him a thousand questions. Now i know theres the possibility the psychic could be wrong. The first 1 i saw i cant account for but the second empowering psychic I have confidence in because I have seen her before and she has been SPOT on with about 99% of info she has relayed to me in the past with out me providing her with any information.
And both of these psychics confirmed that he will see her or run into her again. This is highly possible if they have mutual friends..Now the first psychic told me I can change things by changing the things i neglected before...she said to make things more exciting...get out more...get myself a new hair cut...be more open to trying things with him and this will change the outcome of the reading. I considered her advice because these are all things that for sometime i stopped doing with him and barely paid any attention to him for a while. So is it possible that maybe I contributed to him being "open" to scoping someone out that presented themselves? Obviously he never left me for this other chick but im fearful of what would have happened if our relationship would have continued down the path is was going given he's not one to like to hurt people's feelings, is a bit insecure himself etc?
I read so many things online that share how emotinal affairs if not treated early on can and often do lead to full-blown cheating :(
I can see how these things can happen. Especially when things become stale in a relationship. But he could he have gone so far as to stay with me because he loves me and doesn't want to hurt my feelings all the while slowly growing a relationship with the other chick because it makes him feel good which would then probably lead to sex?
Should I even bother continuing a relationship with a man whose character I doubt in all the time?
I mean, I believe with ALL my heart in his loyalty and when he tells me he has NEVER cheated with anyone in the past. However, when it comes to emotions and problem solving he's very immature so in a way I can see him falling into those statistics of men who never cheated and never thought they would but did because of "stale" relationships or other problems that were fixable ....sad i know
I need some clarity PLEASE :(