It was a very long week last week and I have been drained. But today is the start of a new week. Just a quick update.
We're trying to work thru things once again. I know there was no excuse in him leaving the way he did (again) but I been thinking. It's been a year since his mother passed away (even though she was emotionally abusive it was still his mother) then two of his aunts passed away just a year after his mother passing. I was against going to the funeral home but he had insisted in going. Then he left his job out of the Medical Field he was in an went to a job he hated. Well wasn't so much the job it was the way he was treated. Good news on that is he started back at his old job and he says he's glad to be back at it.
Other then for this gloomy on and off weather today isn't a bad day. I'm going to stay by his side and work thrust this. If it doesn't work I'll go on my way and he understands this. Someone said that divorce isn't the answer and you know......I gave that a lot of thought and they are right. It's not always the answer. Soon as we can we're going to get away from everything and just go off by ourselves. Like our youngest said their all grown now and now it's time we start living for us. Our only girl and the youngest she's 28 years old when did she grow up so fast?
This is sort of a ramble:So I woke up miserable today. I have this loop in my thoughts and that loop keeps me in the negative or extreme positive thought process. There is an in-between but these days I feel like mostly I'm in the negative process. I can't stop having negative thoughts about my life. I keep going back and forth between virtuous and vicious cycles and its frustrating. ...
I am thinking it is my allergies because my ears and roof of my mouth and nose are itchy. I keep having hot flashes which I believe are my ocd/anxiety. can someone please help me come in off the edge of the mental cliff that I am on