Just out of curiosity, are there folks on here who have done the whole song and dance of having been to multiple treatment centers, inpatient, outpatient, done the meds, therapy, 'whatever else they can do' thing, and is still having trouble being stable? I am 'mostly' stable, although I wonder how much of this recovery thing has been because I feel I owe it to those around me, or because I wanted to prove that I could, in fact, do it. I guess there is really no question here...more just the ramblings of someone who is on the edge, knowing full well the consequences of tipping over the side, yet still playing in that area. Minor behaviors have returned and I can fight them sometimes...and other times they just win because I am sooo sick of dealing with all this. It scares me because even after all that stuff and learning as much as I could have ever learned about dealing with this...its coming right back for more and I have much more to lose now than I ever did before (not intending weight or anything there, just the mere idea of what life I have created in the past two years of 'recovery').
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