I feel so disgusting, i want to tear the fat off my body, i've been bingeing for 4 days and am now going back to restricting. I hate the fact that i binge and don't purge,why?! Why when it makes me feel soooo bad do i not get rid of it, i hate myself!!! I feel so repulsive and greedy and long to feel the comfort of bones and hunger. My mood is so low and i'm getting really intrusive thoughts about self harm and suicide. I've been trying to keep myself busy by doing things round the house,speaking to family on the phone just about random things to try and keep my mind busy, i feel like i can't turn my head off and i'm thinking and feeling so much and it's so relentless. AAAARRGGHHHHH!!!!!! I keep thinking if i hadn't binged then my mood would be better because at least i wouldn't feel as repulsed and would feel more able to cope with my thoughts and feelings. I feel so scared and alone and don't know what to do to get through.
Posts You May Be Interested In
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...