I was wondering if anyone had any tools for fighting a binge that they have found actually work. I mean my therapist or other friends/family have suggested going for a walk, or calling someone. I always try to think that I can go to the gym instead of letting myself binge. BUT, that feeling that comes over me something that is not easily fought. Once I make up my mind to binge, that's it! I plan them, I look forward to them, I talk myself into them even. I tell myself that I will just starve myself starting the next day. I tell myself I will starve and work out like a maniac to lose the weight fast, then slowly start eating right and keep working out, thinking that I can trick my body. Never works. My older sister is bi-polar and a drug addict, and she tells me that she would never want my disease, she cannot imagine someone telling her that she can only have a little bit of drugs a day and that's it, b/c with us, we can't quit food, we have to eat. I am so sick of this, so sick of it. I know that I have some such a long way, I really have. But I want to keep going. I have just gained weight again, and so I don't want to go anywhere and been seen, don't want to go out with friends, so I am more prone to binging. I don't even like going to the gym, which makes no sense I know, but I gained weight so fast, I don't want to be seen. I hate the way my clothes look and feel on me. But I do go to work and school, that's a BIG plus for me. In the past I would have lost my job b/c I would have kept thinking I had to lose weight, and I will hurry up and do it, then I can be seen in public and go to work. But it never happened that way. So, I do think that there is an end to all this negativity and depression, and I know it will take time. So I am glad that I have once again joined an online support system. I just am looking for anything that has helped anyone else defeat a binge episode. I am proud to say that I have defeated my purging part of my ED, the thought never even enters my mind anymore. I know that it can still be lingering, waiting to come back. But, I am ready for that. I really don't want to ever puke again as of now! Thank to everyone who reads my post and who has posted and joined this site and shared their stories and accomplishments.
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