Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
I am unsure where to put a post like this- under discussions, or advice. But I need to let it out to someone. I have already let my diary have it, and I will tell my psych when I see her also, but I need to do more
My head is so cloudy and my ears are so bad on days when I don't exercise. I KNOW its part of my recovery and also part of a natural exercise habit to have a day on, a day off, and I have done really well in reducing myself to doing it this way. But the though patterns acoompanying days off like today are so crippling.
I was loathe to have a shower. I felt like I hadn't earned it. How stupid. I am also worried about sitting around all day (which I have to do, because I have to do assignments, and if I do go out of the house it would be for a walk which i would probably turn into a long walk and then I would make myself more tired for tomorrow when I do run, so in the end it would jsut make things worse) even though I know 10,000 steps a day doesnt apply to me, becuase I actually need to rest. But its hard to be happy with sitting all day. Becuase it makes food thoughts worse. I am much more 'hungry' on days off, which makes it harder to concentrate on uni work, which means I a LESS productive on days when technically i should have MORE energy. But I feel much less energetic than yesterday, when i did run.
And I know that I have to push through these feelings and thoughts, I have come a long way in terms of lowering exercise and increasing food intake and lowering anxiety levels in thoughts, but its so SLOW and crippling sometimes I just want to give in and go backwards.
But I know there must be more to life.
Anyone who bothers to read this, thanks, Im sorry its so long. I hope it doesnt trigger anyone. I am staying strong, I WILL have a good day, I MUST get work done, because I have to. So just DO IT!!!!! cOME on
XOXOX TO ALL
My head is so cloudy and my ears are so bad on days when I don't exercise. I KNOW its part of my recovery and also part of a natural exercise habit to have a day on, a day off, and I have done really well in reducing myself to doing it this way. But the though patterns acoompanying days off like today are so crippling.
I was loathe to have a shower. I felt like I hadn't earned it. How stupid. I am also worried about sitting around all day (which I have to do, because I have to do assignments, and if I do go out of the house it would be for a walk which i would probably turn into a long walk and then I would make myself more tired for tomorrow when I do run, so in the end it would jsut make things worse) even though I know 10,000 steps a day doesnt apply to me, becuase I actually need to rest. But its hard to be happy with sitting all day. Becuase it makes food thoughts worse. I am much more 'hungry' on days off, which makes it harder to concentrate on uni work, which means I a LESS productive on days when technically i should have MORE energy. But I feel much less energetic than yesterday, when i did run.
And I know that I have to push through these feelings and thoughts, I have come a long way in terms of lowering exercise and increasing food intake and lowering anxiety levels in thoughts, but its so SLOW and crippling sometimes I just want to give in and go backwards.
But I know there must be more to life.
Anyone who bothers to read this, thanks, Im sorry its so long. I hope it doesnt trigger anyone. I am staying strong, I WILL have a good day, I MUST get work done, because I have to. So just DO IT!!!!! cOME on
XOXOX TO ALL
deleted_user
That is great that you are working so hard to get well. It's also good that you are giving yourself a day off between. I am "recovered" but still struggling. I too have to battle the thoughts against just sitting there. I won't tell you that these thoughts will ever completely go away, they haven't for me even though I'm at a "desirable" weight, but it does get easier to ignore them. You have to choose not to give in to the thoughts, to find something to distract yourself. I'm still a work in progress, but I hope this helps you. Keep up the work with your doc and I pray you grow stronger and stronger every day. Hugs!!
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
