I think sometimes that I can get better...In one sitting sometimes I will order a large pizza.breadsticks...and eat it all..then I throw up...after I throw up I feel so thin and empty that I figure I can eat again..and some days I will do this 6 or more times a day. some days I spend $100 a day on food and throw it up.. the next day my throat will hurt so bad my blood vessels in my eyes are popped,and my glands are swollen, that I try to buy healthy non fat foods so I can eat and not throw up...doesn't happen, I still feel full and so I throw up even if I eat plain lettuce..I sometimes cry because I feel guilty for what I am doing, and I feel guilty because it releases something in me,to make me feel good or like I have accomplished something...I really don't think I can do anything about this anymore, it has developed to be my lifestyle..when I am at my parents house I even threw up in the shower once so they couldn't hear me..I feel like there is nothing I can do and no way out..if you feel like that could you maybe talk to me..I feel alone in the fact that I can't tell anyone because I have a certain standard to stay up to, people expect a perfect life, and all that goes with it from me, because that is who I am outside of my bathroom...
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since ive been stuck home and out of school ive noticed myself feel the urge to cut a lot more. ive been out of school for two weeks and ive cut everyday sometimes more then once my depression has been at an all time high and i think about killing myself everyday damn day
I have a 12 year old daughter who I recently found out began to cut herself. A few months ago she attempted suicide by taking her ADHD disorder, thank God she threw up, and we got help. Today she doesnt want to die, but she has been cutting and when I asked her if she does she said yes. Now I wanted to scream "I LOVE YOU!" and freak out but I had to stay cool. Im a single parent and her father,...