Please, I am in an emergency situation. I cannot stand myself any longer. I have struggled with anorexia, got down to an emaciated state.. then I gained 50 pounds from bingeing over the course of only three months. Since then, I've gotten better at moderating, but I am still about 20 pounds from being really happy. Maybe 15. I know it doesn't seem like a lot but I hate myself right now. Hate myself. Everyday my life revolves around what I eat.I can't eat anything out of "my plan" or I binge for days. It's been a year and I can't lose this weight. I can't accept myself either because my clothes don't fit and I want to feel beautiful again. I've beeb sexually abused and this week my professor came on to me in a closed room. I am so scared and disgusted with myself. I want to kill myself because just being in this body terrifies me. I look down and can't recognize who I am. How can I get back on track? Please help meee. I stopped working out four days ago.. can I undo this damage? can i finally get this right? please, i'm tired of this constant struggle
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